I had to borrow my son’s Ford Ranger to go to home depot to get some stuff. Well me being nosy and everything i opened up his glove box and found a few porn DVD’s and two packs of Cigarettes and used condoms and a bottle of everclear. i don’t know how he got either considering he is 17 years old and everything. I feel so disappointed in him but at the same time i think his cousin is supplying him with all of this stuff and everything. I get the feeling talking to my son is going to do absolutely no good. I am unsure what to do, Advice?
Browsing Posts tagged sons
I am petrified that my son and his friend are alcoholics. I went to his apt and their fridge was full of alcohol. I had our priest call him to talk to him about it. Then he calls me up later and just explodes on me. He is like almost everyone my age I know drinks on the weekends thats what we do. Then he tells me that he is not a child and I need to back off and stop being so nosy. We tried so0 hard to raise him in a nice suburban christian neighborhood and now hes moved off into the filth of Chicago. He has black gangster neighbors and when I was there 2 of them walked in opened up his fridge and grabbed a beer. Then instead of reading up on his career or doing adult things they all just sit down and play his xbox. Then I saw my daughter on facebook and looked at his page and he had pictures of him always holding a beer and there were these black and Hispanic hookers in all these pictures with him. Instead of listening to my advice and going to a church singles group to find a nice christian suburban girl he hangs out with these trashy Chicago girls. Does he want to get arrested for gang activity and get STD’s from these filthy people he hangs out with? What is wrong with my son? Is there anything I could do about it?
My sons dad is an alcoholic and doesn’t have a place to live. I don’t allow him in my place because of his drinking. He has court ordered visitation. Could I get in trouble for breaking that? Because if something happens to my son because of him I could get in trouble.
My son lives with his stepfather and me, but sees his natural Dad once a year, in summer. They talk all the time on the phone. His Dad calls every Saturday. I know my ex is trying to be a good dad, but he isn’t any good at it. He thinks our son is his friend, and tells him stories about how drunk he was at the bar last night, how he got this girl to go home with him, etc, etc. (My ex is an alcoholic who refuses treatment) My son is 14, and is starting to think this is normal dinner table conversation. I tried once to explain to my ex why these bar stories are not apropriate, and he told me I could put my “uptight morality” where the sun doesn’t shine. My son adores his dad, and I really don’t want to put him down, but how can I explain what’s wrong with his dad without sounding negative?
How can this be done when there are only 2 products being used? So confused??
My 2 year old son’s dad and I have never have been married. We’ve lived together for 4 years, even after breaking up, thinking that parenting & money would be easier living together. As of this past weekend, I made a decision to move out in September. This is something dad agrees with, & supports. We both know the fighting has gone on too long.The problem is that dad is a drunk. He lives for alcohol & doesn’t care who his lifestyle affects. He comes home drunk from work (or anywhere, really) on a regular basis, even when he promises each night not to. He can get physical & violent (not in front of our son, this always happens after midnight, so he’s in bed). I want out of this sooner, but I can’t move before my new roommate is free of her lease in Sept. Is there something I can do legally? I’m tired of his alcoholic lifestyle & he doesn’t recognize his problem. And I know he’ll lie if accused of anything. He’s even threatened to lie if in court. I need help. I need to protect my son
We have no shared bank accounts, and I have a house full of my belongings and a situation that doesn’t allow for a “transition home” or anything like that. I have parents that will help, if needed. But I have to maintain my life while making this change. I have an awesome job and I can’t neglect that either.
I can’t just “leave”. Til September, I have nowhere to go, and a “shelter” won’t be happening. His mother is visiting this weekend and I don’t think she has a clue that his drinking is this out of hand, but I’m sure as heck going to tell her.
I appreciate all the advice so far, but I can’t see anything that would work yet. Isn’t there sometime I can do to force HIM out? If I leave, I’m leaving him with all my stuff and I can’t do that. My family is in another state, so this could get complicated, I don’t have local family to help me out. I just thought maybe I could get some sort of order for him to move out or something, and then I could maybe get some assistance to help pay the $900 rent for the next 2 months, or ask my parents.
The lease is in both nof our names. And as of June 1, we’re not on a lease, come to think of it. So I’m not sure what that means.
I’m not “tattling” to his mom, I just need for her to stop seeing me as the whiney, annoying party and him as a drunk. He never does it in front of her, she lives 400 miles away, we barely ever see her.
And I can’t just move. I know it’s hard to understand, it’s even harder to explain. But this is 2 levels of a home ful of my stuff, and everything is unorganized. All my picture proof of anything is on a broken laptop, etc etc. It’s a sticky situation.
I haven’t had a drink in 8 years, and it’s common knowledge that I’m an alcoholic. I wasn’t drinking and don’t cover up what I am. I think it can be a good lesson to others.
First of all, it is always tragic when any young person dies from an overdose. I imagine his family and friends must be going through some immense pain. I would not wish this on anyone, no matter who they were.
Having said that, I have to wonder if this young man’s father, Dr. Dre, is somewhat complicit in his son’s death. Dr Dre’s songs often glorified drug use and the “gangsta” life style, so would it not be surprising that his children would be exposed to this “thug life” philosphy..
Did his son, Andre Jr, grow up in an home atmosphere that condoned the use of illegal and potentially dangerous drugs? Was he exposed to seeing his father smoking marijuana or crack cocaine or abusing other substances, whether legal or illegal?
Was Dr. Dre’s son taught, directly or indirectly, to disrespect or disobey any laws that he happened to disagree with.?Again, if you listen to the lyrics of the rap songs that Dr. Dre was involved with, there is a definite disdain for law and order.
Was Dr. Dre neglectful as a father by not counseling his son against abusing drug or instilling a respect( not necessarily agreeing with ) for the law? Only those who are relatives and intimate friends of the family may know the real truth. But if you know about Dr. Dre’s background and listen to the music he’s recorded, it makes you wonder if the attitudes that he professed in his music were the same attitudes that he exhibited in his personal life and conveyed to his children.
Were these attitudes partially responsible for Dr. Dre’s son’s tragic death? I do not profess to know the exact answer to any of the questions I’ve asked here nor do I believe coming from a substance abuse free, law abiding family makes a kid 100% immune from drug abuse or trouble with the law. I just have to wonder if Dr. Dre’s personal life style adversedly impacted the unfortunate choices his now deceased son may have made.
our family is notorious for abusing alcohol and women. should i intervene or let that lunatic drink himself to a coma ?
he also wants to marry his 9 year old cousin . is this ok ?
My ex-girlfriend drank and drugged during the entire 9 months she was pregnant with my son. I got so mad that she wouldn’t stop that I hit her when she was 7 months. i went to jail and now she has my son. i still hate her for poisoning my son. I had no prior history of violence in anyway so this was a shock to everyone. It was a bigger shock that I got involved with her in the first place but I cant go back and change it. She is the addict, and I am the straight one that can’t be with my son until next year. Any advice anyone??
I haven’t had a drink in 8 years, and it’s common knowledge that I’m an alcoholic. I wasn’t drinking and don’t cover up what I am. I think it can be a good lesson to others.
Being European, I have been told by my Catholic parents, that alcohol is not to be served at my son’s first communion lunch/dinner in May. I have googled communion etiquette, but have not found any particular “guide lines”. Anyone?
Large Problem broke out at the high school my 14 year old son attends at. Right now I’m a student resource counselor at the same high school my son attends, I help troubled teenagers and many times they come to me if they have any issues/problems at school and/or at home.
Recently at school,a child in the same grade as my son, (he is 15) was caught in posession of an ounce of cocaine, apparently has been selling it since school started to his peers by grams. Since I am a counselor at this school, fortunately I was told everything that happened. According to the information, police asked him several questions about where he got it, how long he was selling it, who he was selling for; and it turns out this boy played dumb the whole time and wouldn’t give any information out, and the police were not able to get anything out of him. After 2 weeks, all charges were dropped and he was released scott free,nothing on his record or anything.. but was expelled from the high school.
Does this seem wrong to you? I live in Canada, so the laws will be a little different here. What is your opinion, I personally thuoght he would have gotten jail time, and would have been charged. Cocaine is a hard drug, and has potential to ruin people’s lives VERY easily..
An ounce of cocaine is well over a 1000 dollars.
I’m thinking of having a punch with some rum for my son’s 18th birthday party–Most of my son’s friends are 19 and older (which is the drinking age in Ontario)..so would it really be wrong to have it?
Years of fighting doctors that have him hooked, mood swings, depression, living in a fog, can’t focus, behavior problems that showed up when he started these chemicals at two years old – but it doesn’t “exist” and I’m a “bad parent”. It’s clearly stopping him from accomplishing what HE wants to do in life, the talents he has are not coming out as they should.
Yes, I’ve been all over the FDA website, was on this years ago regarding Singulair that they FINALLY acknowledged as a major problem in many adolescents, but he just gets shoved from one to another. I try to take him off, use food high in antioxidants & anti-inflamatories, lots of vitamin C, but I can’t keep up or control it nor influence him.
I need to find an experienced way that works. He can’t function without these meds now. Playing the trumpet & clearing lungs works, but he’s so fogged, with “A.D.D.” that comes out as O.D.D., so he resists any homeopathic or natural approach. Not a “controlling parent”, just very concerned as I watch this bright kid lose himself – he’s essentially a drug-addict with the help & blessings of pediatricians over the past 15 years, and I’m just a “dingbat”. But I have watched this correlation between behavior patterns and increased chemical usage for 15 years now, it’s so obvious to me but I cannot convince anyone else.
Tired of this pill factory this country has got us on – any tried & true suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Any direct messages to this young man would also be very helpful – my sole voice & efforts have diminishing returns – no good at this point – I’m a “nag”.
Don’t try to sell me anything. Looking for real people who have managed their symptoms or weaned themselves or a loved one off of this stuff.
Thanks much.
Thxs Aeriol- We’ve been thru specific allergies tests, no change in protocol.Asthma has never been acute enough to land him on a nebulizer, but only once 10 years ago.Clearing his lungs via exercise & trumpet works well, but sitting or laying down causes him to cough during allergy season especially.It strongly appears that his body has been relying on these chemicals for so long, that he does need to be re-trained.Switching doctors in July, we’ll see if we can’t get a different approach as you’ve suggested.For any parent with a young child with mild asthma, BE WARNED about this chemical cycle that many doctors put your kids on.There is more data to back up my “gut” feelings about this, I’m no genius, but somebody’s making a lot of money off of these meds & doctors go along with it.Took me 4+ years to get the FDA to support my concerns re: SIngulair & it cost my son, as he lived in a “cloud”, basically “stoned”. With the new “healthcare reform”,it’s only going to get worse. Thx.
my son’s father is a pathalogical liar and uses his children as pawns in his chess game of…getting attention from women, lying, cheating, etc. he’s has a serious selfish problem. he and i were together for six years and in those six years he subjected his children to at least 2 other women and their kids. Now he’s attempting to subject my son to his “new” girlfriend who he met in AA. she’s a pediatric nurse mother of three and a Narcotics Addict. the last girl he cheated on me with thought he lived alone and had this little old dog, for a year he lied to her and continuously took his three kids (one of them, my 3 yr old son) over to her house. While in wal-mart one day, his oldest son, Jamesy asked him, “Daddy, why do you lie to lizzy about where we are going? Daddy why do you live with lizzy when you are seeing Dawn” he told jamesy, “i promise james, i’ll quit cheating on lizzy” at the same time he was buying flowers and asked jamesy to give them to dawn so it looked less romantic and cuter. she bought it. she and i met when he finally checked into detox. Alcohol is just one outlet of his manic ways. he’s up right now and living in vegas “acting” like he’s a changed man. But he’s left two voicemails in the last week and i can tell he has been drinking again. he’s now got his new girlfriend harassing me over texts. i want him to have “supervised” visitation if any at all. right now his eldest son is in counseling at school. he’s 9. he has panic attacks over his dad. he loves his daddy but his daddy has asked him to lie and keep quiet about where they go etc. he’s tells a good lie. i’m afraid the mediator will give him unsupervised visitation when he comes to visit from vegas. we’re in illinois. what are the chances that i can prove he subjects his children to immoral situations. what do i have to do to get my ducks in a row to prove his judgement is impaired. do i need statements from past women, his ex-wife, his eldest son’s school counselor? right now it just looks like we’re all angry women. but i’m trying to protect my child from being hurt like his eldest brother is hurting. HELP.
the son is 24, we put him in a faith based rehab because we don’t hve the $ to pay, my husband spend all his time worrying about his son that my daughter and I are left out of everything, it is like I am single again.
