Incident happened in KY. My son had been drinking and was sitting on passenger side of car waiting for his friend who was sober to take him home. Another friend had taken the car keys, so they had to wait. In the meantime, Ky State policeman pulled up and started cursing and wanted to know where the trouble maker was at. The other guys out side said in the car. The policeman went to our car and jerked the car door opened and told him to get out. He asked him if he had been drinking and my son said yes. He called us and said he was taking him to jail and after 8 hours we could pick him up. He said if my son’s friend could drive our car home he wouldn’t have it towed. It was in Walmart parking lot. He did not read my son’s right nor no test to determine alcohol level. At the jail(drunk tank)he was not fingerprinted nor no mug shot. I picked him up the next day. He had a court hearing and pleaded guilty because he had been drinking but not driving and no alcohol in his possession. When the policeman came to the parking lot my son was not out of the car. My son has to pay a fine inlcuding court costs of 175.50. I have tried to call and see what the procedures should have been but no one can tell me. They even tried to keep 50.00 of his but he remembered them taking it and so I went back , the receptionist said they forgot to give it back. He said they didn’t take mug shot and fingerprint either. When I called the jail and they said yes they did. The county does not have website to check for the information. Was anything done wrong when he was taken to jail? I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t go pick him up but the police officer said he was going to teach him a lesson. Instead the police officer allowed other guys that were there drinking to drive. The police officer even told me that he knows what the guys are doing in the parking lot. This is now showing up on my son’s background check and is hurting him getting hired for a very good job. I can see if he was driving but he wasn’t. He was actually trying to be responsible and called a friend to come and get him. Is there anything we can do to take care of this? I’m not taking up for his actions but I feel this is very harsh.
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my son was thinking of filling a camelback with vodka and wearing it under his coat; is it like airline security that you have to take a coat off? I”ve told him this is not a good idea but am not sure.
My husband left me and my 2 week old son last week. He has a previous arrest for domestic violence and a DUI. He is not a credible individual and has a problem with alcohol. What are the laws regarding child custody? Am I garunteed full custody due to these circumstances? I am meeting with a lawyer this week to ensure my son is in my complete care and my husband only gets visitation rights. Can someone explain to me what the laws are regarding who gets full custody and who doesn’t?
The crack cocaine addict I was speaking of was MY son – and it was my grandson he had sitting outside the crack house. He had been working on my house for the past couple of weeks and I loaned him my car to go buy some paint – and then he called to say he wasn’t able to make it back in time for me to pick my grandson up from school so he would go ahead and do it. I would have bet the farm that he would NEVER put one of his children in harms way – but obviously I would have been wrong. I was just looking for some insight – but if you choose to condemn and judge I pray you never have to walk a mile in my shoes – or those of my son.
I am trying to find a logical explanation for my in laws irrational, bizarre behavior. The mother seems to suffer from moderate dementia, and shows traits of borderline personality disorder. The father shows signs of Borderline Personality Disorder, and severe depression. I feel that all members of the direct biologics have been affected with BPD(borderline personality disorder), 3 siblings have known addiction problems, all siblings show unstable emotional behavior, fear of abandonment, poor judgement, and lack of planning and organization. Problems seem to persist in this family due to lack of confrontation, their method of dealing with issues is simply to avoid them. I am concerned about the well being of my child, and my fiance’s son while in the supervision of these people. How can i get some closure on this issue and not overly offend anyone?
Dementia – Symptoms
Having difficulty recalling recent events.
Not recognizing familiar people and places.
Having trouble finding the right words to express thoughts or name objects.
Having difficulty performing calculations.
Having problems planning and carrying out tasks, such as balancing a checkbook, following a recipe, or writing a letter.
Having trouble exercising judgment, such as knowing what to do in an emergency.
Having difficulty controlling moods or behaviors. Depression is common, and agitation or aggression may occur.
Not keeping up personal care such as grooming or bathing.
Some types of dementia cause key symptoms:
People who have dementia with Lewy bodies often have highly detailed visual hallucinations. They may fall frequently.
The first symptoms of frontotemporal dementia may be personality changes or unusual behavior. People with this condition may not express any caring for others, or they may say rude things, expose themselves, or make sexually explicit comments.
Symptoms of dementia that come on suddenly suggest vascular dementia or possibly delirium-short-term confusion caused by a new or worsening illness.
———————————————————————————————————–BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER
Borderline Personality Disorder – Symptoms
A person with borderline personality disorder often has unstable relationships, low self-esteem, and problems with impulsive behavior, all of which begin by early adulthood.
A common feature of this disorder is fear of being left alone (abandoned), even if the threat of being abandoned is not real. This fear may lead to frantic attempts to hold on to those around you and may cause you to become too dependent on others. Sometimes you may react to the fear of being abandoned by rejecting others first before they can reject you. This erratic behavior can lead to troubled relationships in every area of your life.
People who are diagnosed with borderline personality disorder have at least five of the following symptoms. They may:1
Make frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment.
Have a pattern of difficult relationships caused by alternating between extremes of intense admiration and hatred of others.
Have an unstable self-image or be unsure of his or her own identity.
Act impulsively in ways that are self-damaging, such as extravagant spending, frequent and unprotected sex with many partners, substance abuse, binge eating, or reckless driving.
Have recurring suicidal thoughts, make repeated suicide attempts, or cause self-injury through mutilation, such as cutting or burning himself or herself.
Have frequent emotional overreactions or intense mood swings, including feeling depressed, irritable, or anxious. These mood swings usually only last a few hours at a time. In rare cases, they may last a day or two.
Have long-term feelings of emptiness.
Have inappropriate, fierce anger or problems controlling anger. The person may often display temper tantrums or get into physical fights.
Have temporary episodes of feeling suspicious of others without reason (paranoia) or losing a sense of reality.
Not everyone who has five or more of these symptoms is diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. For a person to be diagnosed with any personality disorder, the symptoms must be severe and must go on long enough to cause significant emotional distress or problems functioning in relationships or at work.1
You may have temporary episodes of psychosis (paranoia and a loss of a sense of reality) with borderline personality disorder, especially when you are going through a personal crisis. This psychosis usually does not last very long. But if it continues, your doctor may consider another condition, such as schizophrenia.
Symptoms of borderline personality disorder are not caused by another medical condition or by medicines. And they are not a result of long-term substance abuse problems. Borderline personality disorder may be confused with other conditions with similar symptoms, such as other per
i am not diagnosing anyone, i just saw the relativity in the behavior i have been exposed to with the symptoms of both disorders. Her mom is from the phillipines and completed 2 years of elementary school. Her dad was an alcoholic who was extremely overweight who is now bizarrely skinny and obsesses on running and not eating. The mother comes by without calling, tried to go thru my stuff in my bedroom, walks out the door with my kid saying ill keep her tonight, wich results as me running outside to stop her and say no! she constantly calls my house, (20 + times a day) to make sure that we are ok.. and that the kids are “warm” and to make sure that our children are wrapped up??? i have never witnessed such bizarre behavior in my life, that is details for you.. find the relevance in the symptoms i listed and tell me if its just a coincidence
over a year ago i adopted now a 5 year old boy. His mother is a addicted to crack and when she was pregnant she smoked crack too. Since he was younger he was in foster care. While in foster care he attended special education preschool. Now that i have him he is attending regular kindergarten since there is no special education kindergarten offered.
He’s been going to kindergarten(school) for past 3 months, but he is not getting any work done and does not focus on his work. His teacher told me that my son is not focusing and is always last one in class to finish his work, if he even finishes.At home he dose the same thing whether he is putting his close on or eating or doing his homework, always he takes way to long and cant sit still. I have been talking and trying anything just to get him to do what he is supposed to do but IT’S NOT WORKING.
MOST LIKELY HE IS ADHD. I need some concrete advice on what and how much can i expect form him regarding his school work/home chores and regular routines and how much can he accomplish. In other words what would be reasonable to ask him to do.
I am desperate and in need of some wisdom from you out there how do i get him to focus and do what he is supposed to. PLEASE HELP!!!
I had a period in my life when I was going through some really rough times with an ex. At this time, I started dating my current significant other. He saw me binge drink to the point of blacking out on a few occasions. I even said some suicidal things while drinking which scared him. This was all due to the fact that I was going through a huge financial loss with my ex boyfriend, whom I gave my inheritance to so he could start a business. The business failed and I lost about 100K in the deal.
Suffice it to say, I was feeling out of control and using alcohol to bury my sorrows. My life has changed since that period. I got pregnant and my drinking was zero for 9 months and since the birth of my son in November I’ve only had a few drinks here and there. I have moved on from my past relationship and am trying to work on the present one.
My current significant other is however giving me an ultimatum. I have to give up drinking totally or he is leaving me. I have a son with him. He says he won’t buy me a ring unless I give up drinking. I was never a big drinker before the bad period in my life. This guy just won’t bend.
What do I do? I don’t want to spend the rest of my life not being able to socialize with alcohol (ie. have a beer with friends, etc.). I went through the partying phase and am over it! I’ve pleaded with my S.O. , but he isn’t budging.
HELP!!
We Are Running Out OF Time
Please Hear US!
My niece 10yrs & nephew 12yrs were taken from their crack addicted mother and their father who is not addicted to anything; the court claims the father neglected to keep the children safe; although their mother didn’t use drugs in front of them; she was actually never at the residence; she would disappear for days; then return home and sleep all day; their father would provide for the children every need; however Georgia DFCS said they were being deprived and took both my niece and nephew into state custody. My sister has all but given up on getting her children back; she’s refused to go into treatment; their father was instructed to take residence elsewhere. DFCS didn’t contact us (the immediate family) during their investigation nor did they contact us after the children were taken into custody. After being notified by my the father; myself and another sister submitted to a back ground check, finger printing & drug screening with hope that DFCS would consider placing the children with us. We passed the test; however, we were told that the father had first choice; however, there is a process that he would have to go through before he could get the children out of foster care; things such as moving out; he did that; he moved in with his brother; after he complied to their request; he was later told he had to attend parenting classes that were assigned to him by DFCS ; all of which could take months; possibly years.
The father is 69 yrs old; he suffered from 3 minor strokes in the past; however, he recovered; he’s in good shape. But with stress of dealing with his children being in foster care could possibly bring on another stroke. I believe he remained healthy and strong for his children and now that they are gone; I don’t know what would happen; I’m afraid his health will deterate ; he cries every time I talk with him; he’s worried and he’s under an extreme amount of stress and pressure. He’s willing to do what ever it takes to bring his children home and he’s fully capable of taking care of his children. But if we continue to wait any longer, I’m afraid we may have to deliver yet some more bad news to his children/my niece and nephew. It’s enough to know that their mother is gone; it would be horrible to loose their father.
We, the immediate family and the father has requested that DFCS place the children with us; As stated above DFCS told us that we will have to wait….Why can’t my niece and nephew be placed in our home (Aunt) instead of foster care until their father comply with DFCS request? We won’t the children home with us; they need their father and their father needs them, they need to be in an environment they are familiar with; and family members they have known since birth.
Someone please help us immediately….Jessica & Jamal would like to come home. Jessica is a straight “A” honor student and I feel the longer she’s away from home the more it will effect her in a negative way. Jessica is actually counting the days; the last time we spoke she told us she had 26 days before she can come home; she’s holding on. I can tell in her voice that she’s holding on; she’s trying her best to be strong…I can also hear in her voice that she’s cracking. her brother Jamal is a very polite boy…he loves his X-Box and Play Station games; he’s funny and out going; DFCS recently told us that he may be placed on medication…we requested that they get a second opinion; we begged that they get a second opinion; but the longer he’s in DFCS the more time DFCS will have to do what they feel is best. January 23, 2009; Jessica called her father from school crying; Jamal has started to act out in school. These children need help ASAP! Someone please help us…I’m begging for help….I’m usually on the computer day and night search for someone to give us some advice. We need you right now. These children were not in immediate harm; they have a addicted mother; that’s the only crime, and the children and their father paying the price.
We are not looking for money; we need advice, we need to be heard !
I’m begging that someone out there hear me before it’s to late. To late for Jessica; Jamal and their father. Someone please help us; PLEASE……Don’t let this story be another DFCS error/horror story TITLED: THE JESSICA & JAMAL DFCS HORROR
PLEASE WE NEED THE COMMUNITY HELP!
WE NEED TO BE SERIOUSLY HEARD.
Aunt
Merissa Young; Arenda Young & D’Quilla Young & Mr. Charles Lackey
youngmerissa@yahoo.com; arenday@bellsouth.com
Just wondering if I am in the wrong here. My husband and I are expecting a baby, I am due in three months. Well I’m feeling concerned about how his mother is going to be once the baby is born. We need to set some serious boundaries, but I want to know if I am going too far?
To give you a little background, my MIL has a serious problem with alcohol, she has been an alcoholic since my husband was a baby. When my husband was young she was verbally abusive and he was even taken away from her to live in foster care for a period of time. And now, she is drunk every single night. She has come to our house completely unannounced when she is drunk, and every time it has happened it is always late at night, around 10-11 pm. Completely unacceptable. My husband and I have been together for 8 years and have been married for 3. This entire time she has either acted like I don’t exist when I am in the same room with her, or has said horrible things about me behind my back. But now that we have a baby on the way, she is finally wanting to get to know me. The problem is, I would rather just have a polite relationship where we are civil when we do see each other, but I really don’t want to get close to her because I have seen how she treats her son and other members of their family. She is very manipulative and delusional about reality (I am guessing due to her little drinking problem) and throws a fit if she can’t have her way. I have no idea how my husband turned out so normal.
These are the guidelines I am going to put in place when my son is born.. do these seem reasonable?
1. She will not be allowed to watch our son alone when he is at least a baby/toddler because I do not trust that she will keep him safe or that she will stay sober while he is with her.
2. She can come over to our house and visit my son as much as she wants DURING THE DAYTIME if she calls ahead and checks that we are able to have company. There will be no barging in unannounced, especially late at night.
3. We will not bring our son over to her house, even if we will be there with him, because it REEKS of smoke and is completely filthy (we are talking cat poop smashed into the carpets that she never cleans up and a thick layer of cat fur covering EVERYTHING).
I rented this house and after signing the year lease, he told me that the ac doesnt work. Then he tells me we cannot put in window units b/c they could crack the cheap vinyl windows. Then we had to fix all the plumbing b/c of leaks, and slow drains. He will not reimburse for any work done, and says he is giving us a break on our second dog, b/c he charges $50.00 a pet. Second dog is a chi/ boston ter mix. Now the ceiling fan in my sons room is smoking and sparking. I am afraid its going to catch fire again. He said he will not replace it, just dont use it.
Does it sound like i have a slum lord, and what steps can i do to protect my deposit?
