My son is 17, 10 days ago we found out he has some bad things going on…We still can figure out if it is Alcohol alone or also weed smoking. He gets in and out of house w/o telling us, he comes some days at 2-3 am or some days 10-11 pm. Has very changing moods. We took him to a drug place for a meeting & the “no so smart woman” there said we needed to listen to him, in front of his face, and they said they didnt need to run a drug test on him…so in other words, they made the parents look like jerks in front of the teenager.
I just came bk f/buss. trip & found out he has a ticket for consumpt. by a minor not driving though-he already went to judge to handle it, but he was hiding it f/us. I called court to find out details and they advised me he has handled it & has some condit’s to meet and $ to pay.
A/o last year has GPA 4.0 & 0 absent days. Anyone pls. can give serious advise as to what to do next, actions to take to get him out of this problem and bk on trk.
Dad & Mom lv w/him
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My husband, myself and my son are furious. My parents never admitted they were alcoholics. I had discussion with my sister & she is supporting him? Why? We love them now that they aren’t drinking. I never thought I would have to beg my sister to support them.
My husband, myself and my son are furious. My parents never admitted they were alcoholics. I had discussion with my sister & she is supporting him? Why? We love them now that they aren’t drinking. I never thought I would have to beg my sister to support them.
My husband, myself and my son are furious. My parents never admitted they were alcoholics. I had discussion with my sister & she is supporting him? Why? We love them now that they aren’t drinking. I never thought I would have to beg my sister to support them.
Making things short as possible:
I have had full custody of my son since he was a year old. Father has not wanted much to do, has been abusive and neglectful in the past to both me and our son who is now 6. I had a restraining order against the father and then had him arrested again for violation of that restraining order. This was in the beginning of 2004. Father was then arrested twice in March 2004, once on cocaine charge and another for fleeing and eluding a police officer on a 1 ½ mile chase going 105 mph. He was arrested and charged, but was already on probation. Some how he only received house arrest for these things.
Anyway, even though the grandparents have always enabled their son, my sons father, they have always protected my son and put his best interest at heart. I agreed to let the supervised visitation be within the grandparents house under the supervision of the grandparents. Still his father didn’t want much to do with our son. Well, sometimes he did, sometimes he didn’t. He hasn’t ever gave him a bath, got him ready for bed, put him to bed or any of those things. Eventually, the order was changed allowing the father visitation rights without supervision from time to time as mutually agreed by me. He went on to sometimes spending time with him to all of a sudden spending time, then taking him to his girlfriends house to sleep over with her son behind my back. I didn’t make any issue out of it until my son told me that he wasn’t fed all day, daddy was bye bye and his girlfriend was sleeping. So, my son and this two year old were left unsupervised and unfed. I immediately contacted the grandparents and THEY told the father that my son would have to stay with them.
So, a long time went on now my son is six. Dad has all of a sudden been spending time with our son again. He has a new girlfriend again, so evey time he gets a new one, he tries to act like the all American dad. Anyway, I haven’t said anything to him. I have always encouraged a good healthy relationship. Well, the dad always seems to mess up. The past few times my son spent with his dad the following has happened:
My son has been saying the F word and a couple other swear words. He doesn’t hear it in our house. I think that I have respectfully done my best to raise him right so far and he is a great kid. My son informed me that his dad says those words all of the time and my son actually asked him if he would stop saying those bad words. Fathers response to that was, “I will say whatever the heck I want to” I don’t grill my son when he comes home. He and I have a wonderful relationship. A few other issues I have are: His dad told him that the cops have been following him and around eveywhere and my son has told me that a cop followed them to the store and daddy’s girlfriend yelled at the cop for harrassment. The last time my son was up there, I picked him up and he told me that daddy kicks girls. He said that his daddy and his girlfriend got into a huge fight and his girlfriend was crying and yelling not to kick her. This is not safe and not a happy environment that my son is used to. I hate to be mean, but no wonder my son calls me and says that he is home sick. I have always encouraged him to go up there but from now on I think I will let it up to my son and will tell the grandparents that dad is not to take my son by himself. Any suggestions??
Everything was always fine when the dad was not allowed to take him places, but then he wouldn’t spend time with him which I am starting to believe that is what’s best. I won’t leave it up to my son. I will do whats best. Thanks for the advice except for Spike. Yeah, very uncalled for. So, you blame the good parents instead of the bad parents that choose not to change? Sounds like my sons father. Yep, you are just like him. A LOSER!!!
Everything was always fine when the dad was not allowed to take him places, but then he wouldn’t spend time with him which I am starting to believe that is what’s best. I won’t leave it up to my son. I will do whats best. Thanks for the advice except for Spike. Yeah, very uncalled for. So, you blame the good parents instead of the bad parents that choose not to change? Sounds like my sons father. Yep, you are just like him. A LOSER!!!
I don’t know if any one else has noticed but the legit questions never get answered. But if I make up some idiot story about how my son just drank a gallon of rubbing alcohol what should I do the whole freaking world posts.
Just before the 4th of July he was arrested again because he had been drinking. CPS wants to take his parental rights away. He went to court last friday and was release on the condition that he starts on antabuce. . On monday at noon he went in for his UA. They said he failed for meth and sending it to the lab. He tells me that he didn’t do anything but had shared a pepsi with the neighbor..and took a sudafed or something for his cold. But tuesday he is worried? He asked me strang ? tonight like if I had certo or water pills? Will either one of those cover meth in a drug test today that he has? And will the antabuce have one of those false positive results I am hearing about.? The judge is not going to give him another chance which means I lose my rights with my grand kids. That is KILLING me to think about as they are 1 and 2 I have raised for a year now. If that test comes back pos. could it be the medication he said? Or am I not giving him a chance again.? Help worried granny!
Dont answer if your gonna lecture everyone cause we dont want to hear it!!
during my pregnancy i had a wine every two weeks or so… my best friend is getting married next week and she’s 30 weeks pregnant… she wants to have a wine at the reception but her mother in law is already calling her a bad mother… surely, i believe, one glass of red wine isnt giong to hurt
oh and my son is 4months old and nothing is wrong with him, had no complication during pregnancy or labour and he is developing early….
My husband and I were on the fast path. We met at work, bought a house after 2 months, pregnant after 8 months and engaged after 9 months of dating. I have a son from a previous relationship and my husband and him are the best of friends. 6 months before we got married my husband tried to commit suicide after I left him from yet another one of his spending sprees. For 2 years he would go on binges of spending, blow up credit cards, blow through are savings and then say he was sorry and would never do it again. After I would rebuild the savings he would go on another shopping spree. I finally gave up and left him, 2 days later we were in the hospital because he tried to kill himself. He got diagnosed with being Bipolar. I am a nurse so I understood all about this. I choose to forgive him and go on with life and the wedding. He was put on meds and started counseling.
We got married and had a beautiful wedding, everything I had ever dreamed of. We then went on our homeymoon and was away for a week. We then had a week at home wit the kids before work started again. We work at the same place so everyone knows are business. 3 days after being at work him and another co-worker started talking. One thing led to another, they exchanged numbers and well after 5 days of talking to her he tells me he is not in love with me and leaving me for another girl. This all happened 3 weeks and 1 day after we got married.
He moved out of the house and into his mothers.For the next 3 days he was with her. No sex but fooling around, BJs, emails and sexting. After those 3 days he was calling me asking me what happened. He couldnt remember. When he found I we were over, again he wanted to kill himself. We were back at the ER for a pysch eval. This time he got sent away for 15 days at a behavioral health center for intense counseling and medication adjustments, they said he was in a manic phase, part of being Bipolar.
It has been 3 months since he told me the news. He just moved back in last week as well as went back to work. My life has been a mess. The other women also works with us. I just cant seem to get the images out of my head. He is trying, taking his medication, going to outpatient therapy and has found God, attending church which he has never done in the past. He showers me with notes, cards, affection and so on. I have seen all this before though when he messes up. I have no trust for him. I wake up every morning wondering when and what will be the next time that he hurts me. I dont know if he can be faithful. I love him but hurt so much. I dont feel like its true, pure love anymore. I just am so confused and dont know what to do. Some of my own family wont even talk to me anymore because I chose to marry him. Help, please help with any advice.
By now it was eight o clock, paparazzi were outside the queens park palace waiting for Lewis Carters to arrive at the conference. He would often do this to build suspense in the atmosphere and get all the people from his home town, Brooklyn, to cheer him on when he got there. James Husky was already in the building., he was Lewis Carters opponent and is the heavy weight champion. He has been fighting professional for 25 years and has been undefeated since he had the belt- he has had eight fights since he had had won the title and has either knocked his opponents out within the first two rounds or they have got so hurt in the fight from his deadly combinations of punches that the coaches and trainers have thrown in the towel. It was going to be the best fight since Muhammad Ali and Joe Frasier fought it out in the famous fight known commonly as the gorilla in manila. Husky was a fairly tall man with a muscular build, he had a very quick reacting mind in the ring, he was a powerful puncher and the unordinary thing about him is that he can fight either orthodox or southpaw stance in the ring. He was given the nickname James the power man Husky after knocking Fredson juniour out in the 2nd round with a lethal uppercut which knocked one of fredsons moulders out of his mouth blood was all over the ring and it was classed to be one of the most memorable fights in history. What made it unordinary was this was when he was in the cruiser weight and the power of the punch was the equivalent of Geroge Foremans awesome hooks.. James always stay focused on the aim of the fight which is to win and that integrity and spirit has won him most of his fights. A characteristic which made him stand outside the ring was that he was very crotchety this was also the case after his fights and in public. Whenever he was victorious over one of his fights he would always end up yelling at a bewildered reporter who he would end up either pushing onto the floor. Even though he was like this, it was what made him entertaining to watch and he is known to have one of the most amazing attitudes to live. In the conference room Husky was wearing an black swage suit with a black striped shit and blue aqua coloured tie, he was sitting in there patiently waiting for the conference to progress.
While James Husky was inside sitting on lined table on the right side of the room sipping his glass of squeezed lemon, loud chaotic noises were coming from outside. Husky got out of his Brown leather chair and looked outside the window and developed a tormenting smile. Outside was a large Grey gold plated 550 Ferrari Maranello, it was being blocked by a crowd and the car was unable to move forward so it pulled to the side of the curve and stopped. The passengers door was opened and Bobby Norton approached onto the road. Bobby Norton was Lewis Carters promoter and had been his promoter for years. He was experienced at what he did and was also a promoter of other great fighters like Ben Gills Olympic silver medallist in welter weight and also Benvollio Dulcet heavy weight champion from 1997 to 1998 however he was less popular when he was defeated by “James the power man Husky” in 1998. Norton was a very popular man also known for when he used to be a entrepreneur for many successful training businesses located all over the States and Europe however he gave all his businesses to his oldest son Thomas Norton mainly due to being so busy in his promoting work. On the other hand nobody really cared about his career professions just cared about him being a good looking multi millionaire mainly because of the many privatized companies that he owns. Which could be anything leisure companies, electronics or even a broad way drug racket for a mob living in little Italy but who knows nobody really tried to get on his bad side in public and in the media, due to the several people who have crossed him in their lives have received extra attention from his body guards which isn’t a pretty site.
It’s kind of a long story but i’ll reward the best answer 10 points for the help. It all started when I caught my son Spray and his friends who are 17 smoking crystal meth in our wine cellar a few weeks ago. After interrogating my son he told me that he got it from my neighbor Phil. After confronting my neighbor about the situation he told me that he saw the boys buying a medium sized ziploc bag that contained what he said looked like “crack” from a african-american man whose street name is Rolo who lives down the street in a rundown trailer. So I called the local police who said they do thier best to try and get to the bottom of the situation and a few days later they came to my door asking me some questions. I invited the two in and when I did they immediately asked if they could search our house, I obliged. Well when they got to my study they were looking through my desk and found a manilla envelope that was enclosed that I had never seen before. Being curious I asked them if I could open it and explained that I had never seen it before. Upon opening it a baggy dropped out of the envelope that one of the officers immediatly grabbed it and asked me if I knew anything about it. I of course said no and the officer asked me too put my hands behind my back and I asked what I was being arrested for and he said the baggy had cocaine in it and that I was under arrest for the possession for a Schedule 2 narcotic, read me my Miranda rights and led me to his cruiser. after arriving to the jail I was givin my phone call to make bail and I called my son who cussed me out for disturbing his XBOX time and hung up, I had to wait 3 days in a holding cell for my ex-wife to bail me out. Of course I was and still am furious and am tired of being treated this way from my drugabusing son. I know he planted the drugs in my house because of the arguement we had the week before. When I got home he sold my uke, my laptop, all my TV’s and just about everything in my house. I called his cell phone asking him what happend and he laughed and said that I’ll never get it back. I again called the police and they came over and told me they’ll “look into it” and just left. I am sick of this behaviour and would like to disown him and move in with my cousin Kholl who told me I can stay with him until I get back on my feet. My question is how do i go about disowning my deliquent son. SERIOUS ANSWERS ONLY PLEASE.
Please stop calling me a troll, i can’t help the nicknames people give others. This is a serious issue and I would like it to be treated so.
My son is 21 . He has anger problem that has to do with disfunctional family history. he does not want to be like his alcoholic father but acts up exactly like him when drunk. His father is away overseas indefinitely and I am the only one left to deal with the problem. I love my son very much and want to help him get therapy for he needs it badly. One nite he break up with his GF and had to move out, he got very upset and breaking things and punching his GF. My friend came to help me to deal with the situation and end up wrestling the mad son down. Police had to be called to resolve the situation. Now he called me and promise to kill me ,my friend and himself. I had him arrested and pushing the court to force him to get therapy. he co-operates but still very angry. Have I any hope to ever get my son realize I love him and want to help him for better life. Will he forgive me?
Is it appropriate to not serve punch, or are there other non-alcoholic drinks that could be used in it’s place?
Okay, this one is a bit tricky folks…
I left when I was pregnant with my daughter and had a 2 year old son. I have had to deal with my ex husband totally ignoring our daughter’s existence for the past 7 years but wanting to have visitation with our son only. Paternity test done so no doubt about him being her dad. I moved out of state about 3 years ago, and have had to drive several hours up to drop off son on Friday night and then back Sunday night every other weekend with BOTH kids with me because I didn’t have anyone to watch my daughter. Ex husband would be within inches of our daughter each and every time and not even say hello or look at her. My ex husband was ordered into counsling to deal with this issue at time of divorce, because he stated then that he wanted no contact with her, but wanted to remain in his son’s life. He has not followed that order. I have begged him both on phone and written long letters over and over to be in his daughters life, to no avail. I recently stopped taking my son up there and told my ex that until he gets help I am no longer going along with this patholigical behaviour. I realize this means my son is without his dad, but overall my son seems to be okay because I have been totally honest and open with him and his sister and my son seems to be more concerned about his little sis and her well being,then not seeing his dad. So the question is, is am I wrong for suspending the visits with the father with my son? I just can’t take it anymore of going up there and my ex acting like his beautiful little girl isn’t even there in the room. I don’t have anyone to watch her so this is NOT an option. Even if I did, I feel like me continuing to support this jerk choosing only one of his children makes me accountable to my children for not stopping this sickness. My ex is an alcoholic as well. I already know that I am in violation of the divorce order but so is he, so that is not really my concern as much as the emotional/psycological aspect on my kids. I have both kids in counsling now since I made this decision to help them with this totally tremendouslly painful issue. I would like to hear from both dads and moms and your opinions about my choice to cut off the contact. I am not able to afford another attorney at this time, knowing that this WILL need to be addressed again in court, but for now I am just biding time. I am hoping to force my ex into getting the help he needs if he wants to be reunited with our son. I truly DO NOT mean to use my kids as weapons or pawns…I just don’t know what else to do after dealing with this in the hopes that their father would come around for 7 long years but still with no hope in site of any kind of reconsilliation. He absolutly totally refuses to be in her life in any respect…what else am I to do?
Okay, a little more depth about this question- I feel like I am like way different then everyone else because well I look at things differently then anyone else. My logic seems to make sense to me and only me and no one else can understand what and how I come to my conclusions. Honestly, I have found absolutely no one who can relate to me. More over, I look at death as a not bad thing-to me, death doesn’t matter. Even if it is a loved one who you care about greatly and just you say “Oh my god, I couldn’t live without you.” or something like that like I just don’t seem to have that same view on life. Everyone is so careful about everything and doesn’t wanna take chances but then they are also hypocritical because they say also that life is short so live it. And I look at rules, laws, restrictions, everything that is around me, and I think it is the dumbest thing, but no one else seems to understand my logic behind these realizations. For instance, drinking age in america. I am 15 years old. I don’t really like to drink, and I don’t like the taste of alcohol but I think that it is ridiculous that the drinking age in america is 21 years old. This is the reason why most of the teens in america die from alcohol related deaths. They aren’t allowed to drink in public, so they stock up, and binge drink and get really f**ked up. This to me is like retarded because if the drinking age was 15 like it is in france then there wouldn’t be this problem of binge drinking with teens. Does anyone else understand that? So far, everyone that i have talked to about it is like “You’re really stupid Dane” (that’s my name…) and so yea. My parents rules are so terrible and I just cant stand them. My mom is SO safe and doesn’t let me do anything. I mean, seriously. I know it is the parents jobs to protect your child, but this is just ridiculous what she does. I cant even get started on that cause I’ll just keep blabbering on about how much I hate it. I, myself, am a outgoing, not thinking teenager. I do the stuff I do, then think about it later. I almost never back out of anything unless it means certain death and I can see it that way. Like jumping onto a bottle of dry ice of extreme pressure. I was dared to do that but I backed out because the danger issue of that is huge. But other things like jumping off of a 15 foot cliff on my old school hard tail mountain bike I do not deny because it looks and sounds fun to me. I of course got hurt on that one but I didn’t care. I did it anyways and didn’t think about it. Even though I am like this, I am still very responsible. I don’t drink, I don’t do drugs, I am like the purest teen there can be now days without being nerdy (sorry if that offends anyone). Haha anyways, seems like I got a little carried away here. Well if anyone reads all the way through this, be sure to answer the question if this is a normal thing or not normal and if I am a bad person for thinking the way like I do…? And if my morals are straight… I’ve been told I’m like the devil’s son the way I think about how death is not a bad thing and how reckless I am and how I don’t think about things. Anyways thank you so much for answering, if you answer. Haha that is all. xoxo
almost two years ago i was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. b/c the term “bipolar” is used so frequently anymore i refused to believe i had it and refused treatment. i had just lost my mom to cancer and went thru a divorce so i just figured it all would pass. well i experienced my highs and lows leading to a dui, a week in the psych ward, being temporarily disowned by my sister and her fam, random sex, binge drinking, bankruptcy from excesive spending and ditching work. last year, labor day weekend to be exact, i got into an altercation with my ex husband which lead to an arrest that carried one felony charge and two misdemeanor charges and my ex was able to take my then 2 year old son away from me. anyway, the charges were reduced and i was put on probation for a year and it is stipulated that i have to take my meds and continue counseling. i know this all sounds bad and really it is, but unfortunately its what it took for me to see that i did indeed have an illness. a year later i have custody of my son back and finally the last few months have seemed NORMAL, until now. recently i’ve been binge drinking to the point i black out, spending like crazy again and just having crazy thoughts. the other night, during one of my manic episodes, i went out with new friends whom i’ve never drank around and made a complete jerk of myself. i wasn’t mean or anything just had a lot of fun and embarrassed some ppl. i apologized by text, but havent heard anything back. its sad too, b/c we all were getting along just fine til that night. anyway, it was at that moment i realized something was wrong. my shrink says i’m rapid cycling and says my meds need adjusted. now i’ve prob lost friends i really like and who liked me up to that point. what scares me is there are no warnings when the meds just arent working right. usually it takes something like this to tell u that something isnt working. for those who have been getting treatment for this for a while now how do u deal with this? i keep reliving that night in my head and want so badly to set things right b/c i’m not THAT girl, but i think i’ve done blown it. i’m so afraid of not being able to have healthy relationships with new ppl in my life. my fam and current friends know how to deal with me. i’m not gonna announce to everyone i meet that i have this and from time to time go nuts. any insight on living with this disorder would be so greatly appreciated!!
My fiance and I have lived together for 12 years and have a wedding date set for next July. Just recently I caught him smoking crack on the back porch of our apartment. We both come from middle class families in New York and until that point I had never known anyone or been around anyone who has smoked it before. We have a 4 year old son and both of my fiances parents died before my fiance turned 2. His granmother raised him and she passed away 4 years ago. I know most of you are probably going to say leave him. but you have to understand that besides this he is the man of my dreams and I have never heard him raise his voice at anyone in the 12 years we have been together. He does not abuse my son or I in any way and I am just at a loss of how to help him. I caught him in a slip with it last week. I do not want to throw him out when he really has noone we are his family. Please give me some advice on what to do? my family is aware of the situation and everyone is devastated by this.
just so everyone realizes he is the father of my son and he has been doing it for a year and started doing it at a job he does not work at anymore he is at a new job. And for those who think that I am not a good mother or intelligent I know you are not going through or have gone through something similar although I probably would think the same thing had it not been me in this situation. Circumstances always change when it affects you directly. My sons safety always come first and him and i have a way out I dont want to turn my back on my best friend and leave him for dead on the street.
The father (a physician) has had recurrent bouts with severe alcoholism. He has several DUIs. Is on probation with his professional career. Disapears into his home for day and becomes so ill we wonder if he’ll survive. The son worries sick because he feels he is all his father has and he should be wih him taking care of him. The mother ( his ex-wife/my sister) found it impossible to handle and left but the son feels unconditionally bound to the problem. She feels powerless as to how to counsel her son. She does not want her son to put his life on hold and leave the job he just began as a teacher overseas. However, his father can’t seem to pull it together and is in the midst of another episode. The situation seems so grave and has ben a burden to my nephew for years!
Is it possible to make someone enter a facility against the persons will. I agree, the son would be so relieved to know his fathe rwas getting the treatment he needs. But, ho wcan he make his fatehr eneter a facility?
this was yesterday he did this I took him and had him tested and he was negative he says he didint take any products
