How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

Please, just read what I had to say and take it at face value. Bashing me is not going to keep me closer to Christ.

I am thinking about leaving Christianity. I was saved when I was 13 and I am not 45. Over the past few years I have become increasingly disenchanted with the religion. Here is why….:

I have a son, who is 24, who is gay. In my whole entire life I have never known anyone who was openly gay, so it was very easy for me to believe all of the horrible things I was taught in church about gay people. I feel like I have been lied to, though. My son has been “out of the closet” for 6 years now, at first is was really difficult for me to adjust to. I had all of these preconceived notions as to who he was going to become because that’s what my pastor had told me. But my son is nothing like the people my pastor always described. My pastor said they all do drugs, are alcoholics, and have promiscuous sex. But my son doesn’t do any of these things, he is a respectful young man who is about to graduate from law school in a few years. He boyfriend is a really nice gentlemen as well.
My husband and I have sort of “adopted” his boyfriend because his “Christian” parents don’t want anything to do with him. And that’s not a story I heard just from him, I know his parents and they told me they put him out until he decides to not be gay anymore.

I feel like I was brainwashed all those years. Even those Christians say that they “love the sinner, but hate the sin” homosexuals are rarely treated well. They are ostracized and abandoned by their families. I am a social worker and we have so many young kids, 14, 15, 16, 17 who were put out of their parents homes for being gay. So while Christians say “love the sinner, hate the sin” they don’t act it.

I don’t know what to do. I feel so lied to. I still believe in Jesus Christ, and I believe that he died on the cross for me and for all mankind, but I just…. IDK.

Can anyone help me with my feelings?

My boyfriend that I have a child with has a drinking problem, and he won’t change his ways. We have a 14 month old son together and I don’t trust him to watch the baby by himself. We recently had an argument (about his drinking) and he decided to move out because he thinks we “won’t be together forever”. The only thing that I have a problem with is his exsessive drinking, other than that he’s really great. Is he leaving us because he is choosing alcohol over us, or because he wants an easy out? Any thoughts would be helpfull!

We have been married for close to 2 years. We have a 15 months old daughter who is my lovely cutie. Combined annual income: $70,000. Before marriage, I had dated 3 women and her 11 men. We are from different cultures: I am African and she’s American. I grew up in a stable christian home; She grew up in a dysfunctional family (dad had 2 extramarital affairs and has kids from them and mum too). My flaws; shower once every 2 days, kinda of messy but I clean up after myself, easily irritated but I have never physically or emotionally abused her, I have a high sex drive
My thinking: Marriage business is between hubby and wife (I keep family out; I rarely call my family but we love each other dearly). 2. Her mum is always in our business. When we have arguments, she vowed to always to stand by her kids. (Eldest son: Alcoholic, keeps moving in and out of house, wife “beater”, all the money he makes he sends it to her “fiancee”; )
Her thinking: If we have arguments she can tell her mom about them. 2. She pays $650/month (due to messed up credit) for her car note. (Camry 2007). I drive a 1999 Malibu which we got at $1000. 3. She wants to pay off $300 every week to a baby sitter yet her aunt charges 100/week (they don’t get along): My mother was willing to baby sit again for free (she baby sat her when she was 2 months until she left when she was 8 months) my mum is a retired professional pediatric nurse. 4. She needs to have a treat every week at a restaurant and have a tour to her hairdresser; $120/week 5. Before marriage she had debts totaling to about $25,000 (which I was willing to help take care of when we get financially stable. 6. She believes that her dad is a “devil’ since he doesn’t agree with her way of thinking. (I get along with my dad in-law; he minds his own business unless you seek for advice from him. he admits that he screwed up with the extramarital affairs but he can never change what happened. He has always asked me not to ever put our daughter thru. that; having another woman in my life)

When we I don’t agree with her she says I am mean minded and sometimes when I lose it, she calls ex-bf (who had proposed to her and later changed his mind) for “advice”. Ex-bf always put pressure on her to look nice and he contributed to her big debt.

P.S: Recently we separated and I was wondering whether divorce is an option (Kinda of not what my family virtues are)

I’ve known my current boyfriend for about 11 years now..We’ve been off and on for the past 4 years. During a long break in our relationship, I was living with and dating a good friend of mine, who ended up leaving me all alone and pregnant. Since then, I have become a mother to a beautiful boy..I had a lot of trouble being a single mother, I felt so lonely, while I loved my son and he fills my life with happiness, I also saw all of my other friends who had children (and were married or in relationships)..So I got back together with my on again off again boyfriend.
Flash forward a year later and we are living in a nice house together, my son and him LOVE each other and things are wonderful! But only on the surface. I’ve come to realize that my boyfriend is a TRUE alcoholic. I don’t drink,smoke, do drugs, nothing of the sort. And I always thought that he was in control of his drinking, but either I was not wanting to see the truth or he was hiding it.
He drinks constantly and sometimes too much. I know alcohol is a depressant and I’ve noticed that even when he’s sober, he’s still a controlling, lazy, rude, selfish a**hole. I’ve lost all feelings for him aside from being comfortable and loving the fact that my son has a “family”. But I realize that it’s not healthy so I have decided to leave and move in with my family for a while to get things together and focus on my education and career. While this sounds so easy, it doesn’t feel that way.
My parents live in a small town hours from here so I’d have to quit my job (that I love and have had for 2 years), my car broke down and is too expensive to fix, so I’d be moving there w/o a vehicle, I love my little house, I’ll miss it and the privacy it allows my son and I, and moving in w/my crazy annoying (but loving) parents does not sound like a dream come true.
I just know that I have to leave him. I refuse to expose my child to this and I won’t stand for it either.
Anyone have experience, tips, etc. that could make this easier?
I’m going to do it regardless, I just need the extra strength!
Thank you
And to Mr. Butler who so “kindly” answered my question…First of all, I’m beautiful, successful and well educated. So to say that I’m “not the pick of the litter” is incorrect and cruel. Yes, I am a single mother and yes, my car broke down but that doesn’t mean I won’t have another. I’m not “poor” as you quoted, I pay the majority of the bills in the household…So with that, thank you so much you ignorant black monkey wearing a tux. You look real nice..Fo Sho!

Everyone else, thank you for the advice.

he left me while i was 6 months pregnant to go back with his ex. but he came back after my son was 9months old. when he went to jail i visit him every month even missed a visiting day.when he got out everything was good. then he cheat on my don’t know how many times and the only reason i found out was because he give me a s.t.d i forgave him he cheated again i found out how?? he gave me another s.t.d last june and he said he cheated because i didn’t show he love. i forgive him again.

he hit me on many accounts one because i didn’t wanna got out or he took the car and disappeared for three days when im the only one work in the household. i forgave him!

his dealing with a meth and crack problem which he stole my washer and dry and stole money out my bank account his had some of his drug friend at my house while i was at work.

im i doing the right thing for me and my two kids my lil girls 7 and my sons 2?

If you came home to find no one else home, but your 16yr old son’s friend rummaging thru the kitchen drawer’s. When you walk in and ask what he is doing he says he is looking for some paper and a pen to leave your son a note. But you notice on the counter next to him is a lock pick and some of YOUR jewelry, pluse he reaks of pot and alcohol. When you ask him to leave he does, but what would you do afterwards? Do you tell your son, call the cops, tell his parents or something else, or even do you do nothing?