I have a five year old son. His biological father died when he was barely a year old from an alcohol induced accident. His father was an alcoholic, didn’t do anything with him or for him and only pretended to be the model father in front of family and friends. He was also very verbally abusive. I have tried over the years to keep in contact with his side of the family and I get a Christmas card if I am lucky. His own Grandmother, who begged me to stay with her after he passed, makes no attempts to keep in touch with him. The last time I called all of them they all told me that they couldn’t afford the long distance phone bills, so I would have to call them if I wanted to talk to them. My current husband is the only father my son has known or even remembers. I have shown him pictures on regular occasions of his biological father, but he still says it’s Daddy and points to my husband. I understand it still may be too early for him to comprehend the situation, but this is where my dilemma comes in. My husband doesn’t want me to ever tell my son about his birth father. I don’t know if it’s because he is worried about him looking at him differently or one day walking away to try and be close to his biological family. I told my husband that one day I was going to explain to him what happened and talk to him about his biological father, even though he wasn’t the best person in the world. He is upset and thinks I should never bring it up to my son. I have always planned on telling my son because he is his birth father. Can a few people leave their thoughts for me, serious thoughts please, and let me know if they think I am wrong for my reasoning?
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I guess you could call my husband an alcohol. He drinks excessively a lot of the time and tends to give up spending time with me in order to drink alone. I know he has problems with alcohol and it has only gotten worse with the passing of his best friend. Understandably he is upset but it has been 2 years now since the accident and he still is so angry and upset, and when he drinks his moods are unpredictable: he could be super happy or so angry that he just yells about anything. We have a 7 month old son together and I don’t want him growing up with bad memories of his father. My husband’s father was actually an alcoholic and he barely talked to him for years because he was traumatized as a child by his father’s drunken behavior. Which is why I can’t really understand why he is acting this way! We have discussed it briefly before but he doesn’t feel he has a problem with alcohol, he feels he could stop any time but he just doesn’t want to. I don’t want to leave him and I know he won’t go to councelling. I am just wondering if there’s anything else I can do to maybe make him see how he is really acting?! So he can choose to change for himself to prevent our son from seeing his father as a drunk.
arent good but he doesnt know how bad…his real dad doesnt help except to get him every-other weekend which is fine with me because I have always did it on my own & he is an alcoholic..But now my son has desided that he is ok with his grades & he is ok with getting barely by as long as he passes…I dont know how to get him motivated again & should I involve his step-dad?? His is a wonderful man & they get along GREAT I just dont want them to start not getting along…that would be horrible..
I could use his truck (we are looking to buy one now) as leverage but I really dont want to have to threating him..
Any suggestions?? I am at a lost & very confused with my sons attitude—–
He is 15 & in the 9th grade….
Oh PLEASE….it is not me failing, you really are rude!!
Thank you guys ! I will try these tacktics…he is a good boy & has a great mind & YES I will be talking to my husband..like I said he has an idea but he lets me handle the kids & knows I willl come to him a crunch. Tutor sounds like a good idea! You guys are right it is time to make this a family matter…
I get NO Child support & he doesnt even cover insurance,lunch,clothes,school supplies or NOTHING!!
Its ok BillieB everyone has there own opinions & this is a touchy subject…especially for kids..
Great, yall have help me make my mind up time for a family meeting…I have got to figure out what has changed in that boys mind…& I am going to email his teachers (again) to set up some extra classes & or tutoring…THANK YALL sooo much …it is going to be really hard to pick a best answer!!!
mine died of cancer and blessed us with five small lots and an old mobile home. We live in this mobile now. My brother and his wife were infuriated and jealous and made it a point to hurt my husband and me in any way they could think of. They called CPS and accused my husband of molesting our nine-year-old daughter. (They were NEVER at our house!) My daughter was questioned by CPS and “they” determined that there was no evidence of molestation. DUH! We have grown sons and daughters and they were horrified that their dad and I went through this. This happened about two years ago, but it has come to my attention that this was kept in the files of CPS. WHY??? I am angry, upset, furious. No charges were ever filed against my husband. I am a stay-at-home mom. My husband works 12 hours a day in another town. He NEVER touched our daughter and never would. NO, I AM NOT IN DENIAL ABOUT THIS! Why does CPS keep something like this on record. What can we do? Anyone else had a similar experience?
He has an alcohol addiction, which means he can go for months without drinking, and suddenly gets very drunk at an event. I have been showing him tough love, so really, that’s not my problem. I mean if he can’t accept it, what can i do? My problem is that i have a 17 year old boy who has had a drink or two when he goes out to party, but one day he’ll eventually will get drunk (we all have). How can i correct him or advice him, without putting his father as an example (He’s a great dad and deserves respect). won’t my son rub my husband’s addiction in my face? I almost never drink, by the way. Can’t find the fun in it.
He said he didnt think to pour it out, and he hid it so noone would think it was his. My son also asked me why do I think he comes home chewing gum. its to get rid of the smell. My husband can’t smoke inside his work, so he says he chews gum when he can’t smoke. I asked him why come home chewing it when you can smoke, he said he guessed he liked chewing it. The part of me that believes he isnt drinking is because he was a very violent and aggressive drunk, and I’ve not seen that lately. We have had some arguments but not like before. And when he drinked, he never drinked whiskey or liquor, only beer. My son suspects he’s drinking stronger alcohol to get drunk quicker. My husband’s daughter and sister even suspect he’s drinking. I know I should believe my son also, but I have not found anything to suspect from my husband. What should I do? My son is his stepson. I thought my husband was going on 9 months sober. Please help me.
My alcoholic husband finally took the hint and left. He never calls. Does that mean he doesn’t care?
Married 6 years. Husband’s alcoholism progressively got worse, although he still retained his job as a school administrator. He loves the bars. I tried to keep up with him for a while, but couldn’t. He became verbally abusive, flirted with other women (I can’t prove adultery) and refused to get help. His mother and extended family try to talk to him sometimes, but don’t really force the issue. After all, he is the favorite son and cousin. He and I are both 54. I nagged, begged, made excuses, etc. I went and got him when he couldn’t find his car many a ‘next day’. He is the Cell Phone King and loves to wife bash. He has told lies about me, even sober. He lost his cell phone when he was out TWICE in bars and guess who he blamed? He finally left after I continually told him that if he wanted to live the single life, he needed to live it outside of our home. He has been gone a month, living in the same town. He has not tried to call or communicate. I don’t want the drama anymore, but I wonder if he truly doesn’t really care and I need to accept it. Is the fact that he doesn’t communicate a sign that he is ready to move on? I can’t ask him anything; he refused to talk about anything serious when he was home.
When my husband of 6 years gets a “buzz”, he is verbally abusive to me and my son.(from a previous relationship) When he’s sober and I tell him what he said or did he calls me a liar and denies it all. I have left him many times but I keep coming back. He has started AA classes and soon as he realizes I’m back, he stops AA and starts drinking again. I love him but this is causing me to really dis-like him. I am not attracted to him anymore because of this reason. When we lay down together all I smell is beer and his eyes are glossy. I need advice on what to do. I don’t want to turn my back on him, we have 2 children together and i have one from a previous relationship who looks up to my husband as his daddy. I don’t want them to think it’s o.k to drink a case of beer a day.(and still walk a straight line)
my husband is an alcoholic and he’s mean to me when he drinks he always tries to bring me down he’s he always comes on to my best friend i don’t know what to do i love him but his drinking is too much for me to handle
my husband is an alcoholic and he’s mean to me when he drinks he always tries to bring me down he’s he always comes on to my best friend i don’t know what to do i love him but his drinking is too much for me to handle
My husband left me and my 2 week old son last week. He has a previous arrest for domestic violence and a DUI. He is not a credible individual and has a problem with alcohol. What are the laws regarding child custody? Am I garunteed full custody due to these circumstances? I am meeting with a lawyer this week to ensure my son is in my complete care and my husband only gets visitation rights. Can someone explain to me what the laws are regarding who gets full custody and who doesn’t?
my husband is an alcoholic and he’s mean to me when he drinks he always tries to bring me down he’s he always comes on to my best friend i don’t know what to do i love him but his drinking is too much for me to handle
my husband is an alcoholic and he’s mean to me when he drinks he always tries to bring me down he’s he always comes on to my best friend i don’t know what to do i love him but his drinking is too much for me to handle
my husband is an alcoholic and he’s mean to me when he drinks he always tries to bring me down he’s he always comes on to my best friend i don’t know what to do i love him but his drinking is too much for me to handle
relationship has become very bad.He does not even want to have sex with me.I am 45 and he is 51.Some how although he is an alcohoiche likes to shout at me only for all his problems.last 7 years not a sinle time he has had sex with me. whether he has another woman or women i am not very sure. but he tries to fight for no reason.I have one adoted son. whi\o is 9 years old.
My husband has been sober for 2 months now. He hit his 60 day mark and I would like to have a celebration dinner for him. It will be me and my 3 kids and some close friends. My son came up with the idea of having his favorite dinner and a dessert. I need ideas on some good quotes to put on banners to hang up for him. Any ideas?????
I really miss him terribly and still love him dearly! He knows this but he can be very nasty when drunk! I feel this is a onesided love with me giving my all..he says it is not!! We still talk but God knows..I still love and miss him but cannot have him move back as I am afrain that the drinking will drive me insane! I am not a drinker! please tell me what to do and how to handle this as I am falling apart! My son has been hurt by this and says he will never forgive him for being so verbally nasty toward us! This is my son and he is the step dad so my son says that he is not losing much..I feel that he can learn alot from my husband as he is intelligent, a good person overall..just the drinking is his downfall!!!help!
My husband and I have four children, now all grown. After our youngest moved out, I left my husband. All during the marriage I asked and pleaded that he clean up. He would often lie to me, saying he quit, but I found out after the fact that he was indeed still using. My husband and I have been seperated for three years — I can not afford to pay for a divorce and he just assumes we will be back together any time now. My husband did attend treatment for three months after I left him, but every time I see him (family functions, etc) he is having a ‘few’ drinks . At our son’s wedding on Friday night he became intoxicated and my children felt it was my duty to bring him home — as he is my husband. I refused and left the reception. What can I do? They don’t get it.
I think I need to clarify why I can’t afford a divorce. We had a business together, which failed, and we owe nearly a half million dollars. Bankruptcy is an option — but I would have to file on the corporation to clear that debt — which is much more costly than a simple personal bankruptcy. I have been searching high and low for a job — I have earned only a few thousand dollars this year. I can barely afford to eat — much less hire an attorney. So, it’s really not bullshit as one person stated. It’s a financial nightmare, combined with alcholism. I truly don’t need critism – had enough of that to last a life time — I need constructive advice.
we’ve been to counseling, i’ve prayed about it, talk to my pastors about it, tried to get him some help that he don’t want , talk it over with him how i felt about it, stayed with him for ten years we’ve been married for five years, we have a son that is 7 years old he doesn’t even have sex with me anymore it’s been 4 months what should i do now i’ve been to the court seeking counsel with an attorney about seperation and divorce is there hope or what else can i do about this man of mine?
They provided all of the alcohol and no food. I will not expand upon many details but this was a serious situation and our neighbors are sueing us for their son falling down at our house. I do not need opinions regarding marriage/relationship. Just the possibality of receiving compensation for my injuries as well as pain and suffering?
