How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

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ok, here’s the thing… We have a neighbor,”Dave.” and his mom,both on heavy-duty psych meds. I tolerate them, because in the complex I live in, I have to, in order to get along with everyone,and live peaceably.

Well,Dave is a nice guy,and his mom,well, let’s just say,she takes alot of getting used to.
She has this habit of barking,or cackling,when she laughs,and it hurts my ears.
At dinner,one night, we had treated them to an all you can eat buffet,that costed my hubby 60$,and we NEVER treat people out to eat,so this was a treat for us.
We were sitting in the restaraunt and she kept making comments on my kid’s weight. It was crowded,and made my kids upset.I glared at her and her son,Dave,asked her to stop. I didn’t say anything,as I was raised,that with “those kind” of people one does not make bad comments such as what I was going to make. I did, however,give her a dirty look,and she quit.
Her son,Dave, is an alcoholic. He is one that sneaks his booze,and on this night, had went into the store,under the guise of getting a prescription filled,and the pharmacy was closed. So,with the medicine money,he bought a 40 ounce bottle of beer.
I had told him,not once,but three times,that i do not allow alcohol in my van.This was on 3 seperate occasions.
He kept looking at my husband,as if he would intervene.
Hubby knows better than to do that,especially when it comes to alcohol. Not to mention,my kids were in that van,also.
Then next day,Sunday,his mom came over and gave us “gifts,and made comments about my hubby being shirtless.
in his own home!
It was hot and my husband has high blood pressure,so he likes to be cool.
She alwo went into my kids’s rooms without asking and kept playing with my cats,who really didn’t want her touching them.
Some of the “gifts” were broken ( a china tea set,she gave my 6 year old daughter),or old,( an “antique” doll) or torn ( this in the case of clothes), or a leather jacket, which was torn, but mendable.
Needless to say, my already-thinnming patience was gone,by the time we sat down to have lunch.
We are not a sociable family. We have our friends and we have our hobbies,and do not like interference with out routines,and weekends we like to have for family. I tried to convey this to “Linda” many times, but she didn’t pick up on the hint,till I had rudely taken a cat toy that had a bell in it,away from the cat and put it up.
Then,today,Dave had the gall, to knock on the door and ask if hubby can take him to the store,for “groceries”. I opened the door,and Dave didn’t even look at me,but ignored me and looked at hubby.
This was the final straw!
i have no patience with people who drink,and little patience for people who are doped up on psych meds,and can’t take a hint.
It wasn’t hubby who paid for that van,I did.
I went off,needless to say. I had told Dave,that we were not taking him anywhere,because for the last three times,he had alcohol in MY van,and I did not tolerate that.I had told him,three times, NO alcohol,and he said he “forgot.”
I then told him,that he would have to find another person to take him,that we were not taking him anywhere,because he ignored my rule,and I didn’t buy the “I forgot” BS.
I then told him,that i paid for that van,and that I said who rode in it, not hubby.
He asked if Eric would take him,and Hubby ignored him,kept on eating.
That man would not take “no” for an answer.
I went on to tell him to look at me when I spoke to him,and that Eric didn’t have any say-so,as to who rides in the van,that it was for our personal use,and that he would have to go elsewhere.
He stood in the door,and kept looking at me and Eric,and back again.
I told him,rather loudly,that we were just sitting down to eat lunch and he’d have to leave. Again,he stood there. By now,I was thoroughly furious.
Eric kept on eating and ignoring Dave.
I then began to shut the door,and he asked if we would take him shopping,since his food stamps came in on the first. i told him,that no, would would not take him,that I like my shopping to be for family,only,and that I load my van down.”
Again,he stood there,looking at Eric,as if he would respond. He didn’t,kept on eating.
I could tell i made hubby mad,as hubby hates to make anyone mad,and is a push-over. I am not.I am clearly not one to make mad,and have a very short fuse with people like Dave.
I take alot,but references to both of my daughter’s weight,in public, going into their rooms without asking and going into my Altar Room, ( i’m Wiccan) without asking and touching my altar,is a huuuuge offense)
and that I felt I had the right to go off on Dave,especially when he brought beer into my vehicle when he was told not to,is grounds for having his butt chewed.
Did I do the right thing, or could i have handleled it differently??

Ps,i’m still mad!

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I was a good and loving mom,till drugs and alcohol became more and more important than doing the right thing for myself and my son.I had a loving husband,a new home,a car and:my freedom!I lost it all.Husband run away,CPS took my son a 2nd time,house went in foreclosure,car got impounded,I went to prison and got deported.In prison,I took advantage of every program there was,to get my son back.In prison I realized what I had done.Hell broke loose when CPS started talking about adoption.His grand mom in the States got denied after all,my parents in Germany got on it,on being approved,to get my son,to raise him in Germany.Everything was fine with my son (4 years old),til 4 weeks after he´s seen his Mamie for the last time,at the CPS office.He started to act out,would jell and cuss and cry,because his Mamie wasn’t´t there anymore,the one that he loves so much,and no one there,to let him know,that Mamie still loves him and she will come back to him,but right now, she is in “Timeout” for a little bit.That´s when I had gone to prison.I never hit my son,but I yelled at times a lot.I never ever backhanded him in his stomach,so hard,that he threw up.I never locked him in the closet for day´s and left the house!!!My son and I were together 24/7,ever since he was born and his dad went to prison when he was 3 mo old.He got sentenced to almost 12 years.All these story’s are from people,that didn’t know any better than talk BS and lies.My son had a habit of drinking warm chocolate milk and right after that,to play with the dogs or run arround,so that he made him self sick.And I know in my heart,that my ex neighbours were the once that said that I would lock him in the closet,because there was a situation,were the windows were open and I had to go somewere and my son wouldn´t listen,so I told him,that if he doesn´t wanna go,he can stay at home,but I have to lock him in the closet.I did,for a moment,to teach him a little lesson,and it worked.Now he is with my ex´s ex(they have a daughter together).After my son finally got my letters,4 mon. later,he started acting out again.I wonder why!?After all this time,just abuanding him,not wanting him anymore,of course he´s mad,he dosen´t wanna have anything to do with me,that´s how I would feel,if I were my son!!!!Instead of explaining him,what´s going on,they have him see a Psychologist.Posttraumatic stress disorder,with reactive attachment disorder,twice a month!And after only 2 weeks back in Germany,I got me a job,an apt.,got enrolled in a substance abuse program,classes,drugtesting etc..And now,my services with CPS got terminated,next hearing is in Nov.,I never had a fair chance,to see the Jugde,to justify myself.My son is 6 now,I haven´t seen him in 2 years,no contact what so ever…….How could I ever let this happen?????So,what do I do now????
Thank´s to everyboby who took the time to read my story and to coment on it.
Thank´s to everyboby who took the time to read my story and to coment on it.

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My son in a alcoholic, is there any drugs in tablet form so that he can give away drinking. He is not a easy person to go for advice or therapy, only choice is to give him tablets without his knowledge. Anyone can help me.

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relationship has become very bad.He does not even want to have sex with me.I am 45 and he is 51.Some how although he is an alcohoiche likes to shout at me only for all his problems.last 7 years not a sinle time he has had sex with me. whether he has another woman or women i am not very sure. but he tries to fight for no reason.I have one adoted son. whi\o is 9 years old.

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about 3yrs ago i got a call from my dad stating that my sister’s husband was making meth in their apartment, he husband was very abusive to her and myself i lived with her and him for a few month and while there he would beat my sister i would have to rip him off of her and take matters into my own hands well when i moved out i guess a few months later he started making meth in their apartment he used to buy it, do it and sell some their apartment got raided and my sister got charged with 3 counts of child endangerment and was put in jail her kids were taken away and placed with his parents. They are unfit parents, their sons are both meth addicts and they support their habits bail them out of jail, etc… my sister has done everything the courts have asked her to do to get her kids back and everytime they go to court they claim she hasnt done something she was supposed to. I want to step in and get guardianship of them but not really sure how i would go about doing it. i am planning on getting a house big enough for them i have two boys of my own. those girls are not getting taken care of the way they should be. my sisters mother and father in law put chloe who was 3 or 4 at the time on medication because she wouldnt sit still and said she had ADD i dont know who in their right mind would put a TODDLER on medication like that she went from being bubbly and happy 24/7 to a walking zombie. i want those kids out of their so bad, i just want to see them happy again the way they used to be. They live in Iowa so how would i go about that in iowa courts.

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I live in logan county Ohio, My ex mother in law is trying to get visitation to my son. however she is an alcoholic and is addicted to pain medication how can I stop her from enforceing grandparents rights in Ohio???

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My 27 yr.old son has been struggling w/drugs & alcohol for 8 years. He had a great job & was very responsible up until last year when he walked away from his job; sold everything,and ended up in jail where later the Judge ordered him into a Rehab. Facility – which he has been to several with no success. He has been living with me now for 2 weeks & no attempts to get a job. I’m disabled on a fixed budget yet he needs to be driven to many places to keep him from violating his probation. I’m nervous around him & he has changed. Yet he has had no urge to do drugs. He say’s he is full of fear. He has no place else to go & if I do ask him to leave he will inevitably end up back in jail or doing drugs again. I’m torn. I seem to worry more than he does about food & having money for gas. I know what he is capable of doing when it comes to work ethics; people love him. Should I be silent & let him work his demons out or stay on his butt to go get a job & get his own place?

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My son is 2 years old. when he was 2 months old his dad left us to never see him again.

He never called or came around. which is great.
I moved out of town and I finally came back for good. His family does not call me to ask about the baby or any thing on holidays or birthdays. which is ok cause I don’t want them around. (I just want to say that to show you that they don’t come around.)

Ok so I moved back right, I am going on 3 years with my fiance we want to get married and doing the family thing.

I want to know if I can go to court and say that his bi-logical father can never come and be like “Hi, I am your dad”, nOt the one that raised you for all this years.

I have talked to him he said that he will not come into our lives for the sake of not confusing the boy with having 2 dads.

But I just want something on paper that says he is legally mine and only mine.

oh yeah he ws in jail for beating up his niece and he cannot be around 16 and younger children, he has no job, no car, no education, no place to live and is a recovering alcoholic and drug user.

What can I do to insure that we will not come around and want to see him or try to get shared custody?

also how can I change his last name to mine?

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My son told me that two days ago a Freshman boy died in the dorm I got my son out of last fall. He died from a combination of alcohol poisoning and codeine. What, if anything, can the colleges do to prevent these tragedies? They are pretty good at taking tuition money. Do you think they have any more responsibilities toward our children than to present them with the opportunity for a higher education? I thank God my own children have good heads on their shoulders, but I hate to think of kids dying from stupidity and immaturity.

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My brother wants to get full custody of his son. His son’s mom has a terrible background she cheated on my brother, then married the guy then cheated on her husband, and is living with an “alleged” Meth dealer that has beaten her up and has threatened my nephew. He has been in 4 different homes since she divorced her husband only like 4 months ago She also has past drug problems (we think she is using again obviously) he has a few people that will testify in his favor and this includes her ex husband and the father of one of her other sons (she has given up custody of her two oldest boys) He has tried to talk to her about taking his son for the summer and she accused him of trying to take him away from her. I know its hard for dad’s to get custody and he doesn’t really have the money to get a good lawyer. Is it possible for him to do it on his own? is their any organizations out there that help dads in these types of situations?

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I have a 21 year old Step Daughter who has recently been in and out of jail. She is a meth user. We have gotten her a sponsor to help her, but she has only contacted her once. She is doing nothing to help herself by getting help or a job. She lays around the house and does not clean up after herself and rarely bathes. She also brings home not so trust worthing people and I have tried to talk to my husband about putting an end to it. And all he says if I don’t let her have her friends over she will leave. What do I do? When my son had a problem we sent him on his way. He has learned to get by and live with the mistakes he has made, but my husband finds it alot different because she is a female. Please help me.

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How do I get past my 3yr olds father jumping in bed with a mutal friend and getting her pregnant less then 3 months after we broke up?
I have 2 boys 3 & 5.My 5 year olds father (shawn) died 1 week before he was born due to pneumonia. I was single for a while then started dating shawn best friend Brian a year after shawn died. We dated for 4 years and 2 years into the relantionship we had my 3 year old. we have been broken up for 15 months now and i just found out he has been dating a mutal friend of ours and they have a 6 month old baby. That means she got pregnant (i think she trapped him) less then 3 months after we broke up.
The girl was a mutal friend, she dated one guy for 10 years and said she took birth control every day at the same time and she knew about medications affecting it because she worked at the doctors office. When me & brian broke up she said she would talk to him (i was in NC him in VA) and help to get him to come back that was the end of OCT beginning of NOV now i find out she got pregnant by him in JAN and she said “well sometimes things happen” I think she trapped him to keep him from coming back.
Anyways I dont want him back Im in a happy relationship but it just makes me crazy and so sick that he did that BOTH of them did that. I just want to get over it but i want my son to have nothing to do with that family (last i knew they both drank a lot, & he’s always been an alcoholic) i dont want him to be in that situation but i know i cant keep him from his dad. Now brian is saying he cant send me as much money because he has two kids to take care of, well so do i and i need whats owed. but its more difficult then that so we cant just go to court, because of medicaid and so on. I just want to get over it and not be so angry all the time. but how when i hate what he did to me and my son and it makes me sick!

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Right now I’m going through a paternity suit filed by the state against my son’s father.They’ve given him ample opportunities to take paternity tests, but never showed up. Now it’s going to court.
He’s made it known that if he pays child support, he will seek visitation or partial custody.
He has an extensive criminal background including meth manufacturing/distribution (in 2 counties)and recently picked up domestic assault including felionous restraint and another assault case in another county. He’s currently been order to complete Drug Court and to live in a rehibilitation house. I’ve been told that as long as he’s doing what he’s supposed to be doing, he will probably be granted visitation rights. However, my son is only one and I would at least like for him to be old enough to pick up the phone and be able to call someone if he’s in trouble.
Anyone else experience any situation like this? Serious matter. No comments about my choice in men… he didn’t use to be such a psycho:(

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I am 27 (almost 28) and married with one son. I’m heavy, and I want to have a baby. I’ve been trying for a while with my husband… but it isn’t working. I have quit smoking and I have been exercising and working on my weight. I don’t eat meat, cheese, or milk, get a lot of veggies, work out for about 35 minutes a day cardio and 20 min with weights and 3 times a week do yoga at home. . .

I don’t want to do fertility treatments yet and my doctor said I shouldn’t be trying because I am too fat. I don’t know. I’ve always been heavy. I was 311 when I had my son when I was 19. When I was much younger I did meth (from ages 12 to 17) and during that time I was still 200-260. Who has ever seen a fat tweeker? Well that was me.

Of course, I don’t do drugs or drink or anything now! I haven’t touched them in over 10 years – just in case you were wondering.

I had irregular periods for a long time, but started taking Vitex and that evened them out.

It’s been about 9 – 10 months total since we have been trying and nothing. We went through a rough patch May to July, I don’t know – but we weren’t trying then. But all in all it’s been 9-10 months and I am getting so frustrated.

Of course I have “considered” losing weight – heck if you read the first part of the question – I am even working really hard on it! lol

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My sons biological dad is not in the picture my son doesn’t know him. He has been in and out of jail and the nut house for domestic abuse (me and his new gay lover) he is addicted to meth and apparently is gay now (probably from being in jail so much. So obviously you can see why I want him to have no contact with my son (not that he’s tried to see Logan for the past 5 hrs) he pays no child support but That doesn’t bother me. Logan calls Steve,my fiancée, daddy Steve has been the one supporting Logan for the last 4 years we have been together. Steve IS logan’s dad as far as we are all concerned. But unfortunatly, Logan still has his bio-dad’s last name. Steve wants to legally adopt Logan as does Steve’s and my family. I just don’t know how to go about doing it. Can’t afford to get married just yet. My question is this: how do we go about Steve legally adopting Logan do we absolutely have to be married first? Or are there certain loopholes? Please helpi need some good advise. Has anyone experiance similar to this? Again please help us

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He is a bi polar alcoholic and has not been in my son’s life since he was an infant. I could go on and on and on about how he is not capable of caring for a child. He didn’t see him or get him anything for his first Christmas and I had to force him to come to his first birthday. He parties and grew up smoking pot with his parents and I wouldn’t be surprised if he tried to do that with his own kids. He is living in a camper on someone else’s property, won’t change his mailing address because he doesn’t want the police to know where he lives, or the court so I can’t get child support set up. If I make a will and put in it that he is not a suitable parent and why, would that be sufficient or is there something else I need to do?
lol.. No! I don’t plan on dying, It’s just my worst nightmare that my ex would end up raising him, would I end up dying in an accident or something.
SolarFlare, your answer is very disturbing, you are a sick person.

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I know that a lot of innocent children are harmed during the making of coke, but to think that cocaine is getting profit out of their teeth is just wrong and makes my feet warm. How are we supposed to protect our children if propane is making profit out of both cocaine and coca cola and the only ones to thank for gas is the children? I’m assuming this is why we’re supposed to tell our kids the tooth fairy exists, so we can give their teeth for coca cola’s cocaine, but how do they get it? I guess the general question is me wondering if cocaine is made out of children’s teeth and if this can be prevented by telling them the truth about the tooth fairy. My son is fifteen now and I think he’s getting suspiscious, I had to take him out of school because his friends were telling him that the tooth fairy wasen’t real, and I’m not going to let my bills pay for what cocaine is doing to our children!

This is for all the parents out there who don’t want Coca Cola being the new Google!

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He is a bi polar alcoholic and has not been in my son’s life since he was an infant. I could go on and on and on about how he is not capable of caring for a child. He didn’t see him or get him anything for his first Christmas and I had to force him to come to his first birthday. He parties and grew up smoking pot with his parents and I wouldn’t be surprised if he tried to do that with his own kids. He is living in a camper on someone else’s property, won’t change his mailing address because he doesn’t want the police to know where he lives, or the court so I can’t get child support set up. If I make a will and put in it that he is not a suitable parent and why, would that be sufficient or is there something else I need to do?
lol.. No! I don’t plan on dying, It’s just my worst nightmare that my ex would end up raising him, would I end up dying in an accident or something.
SolarFlare, your answer is very disturbing, you are a sick person.

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He is a bi polar alcoholic and has not been in my son’s life since he was an infant. I could go on and on and on about how he is not capable of caring for a child. He didn’t see him or get him anything for his first Christmas and I had to force him to come to his first birthday. He parties and grew up smoking pot with his parents and I wouldn’t be surprised if he tried to do that with his own kids. He is living in a camper on someone else’s property, won’t change his mailing address because he doesn’t want the police to know where he lives, or the court so I can’t get child support set up. If I make a will and put in it that he is not a suitable parent and why, would that be sufficient or is there something else I need to do?
lol.. No! I don’t plan on dying, It’s just my worst nightmare that my ex would end up raising him, would I end up dying in an accident or something.
SolarFlare, your answer is very disturbing, you are a sick person.

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up smoking pot. He has not wanted me to work for some time. I work two days a week every other week. I have had enough he was drunk on Christmas when we had family here and had to keep running to go get high. He even let his son drink here. I blew up. This man is 47 years old and he acts like he is 16. He goes to work and performs his job. He just can not be a father or a husband. He goes out every free moment he has from work. He dose not do one thing around the house. With the house or car and truck. He has two boys they are 16 & 18 he dose not spend any real time with them. I have a daughter she is 22 and pregnant and she said she will not come here again after the baby is born. She said she just won’t take the risk. I can’t blame her. I just don’t know how things have gotten so bad. I can not stand living this way I feel all alone. I have asked him to go get counseling for himself and us. He said he has no problem. I don’t fit into his plan in life. I don’t want to spend every night in the bar. I am waiting for my daughter to have the baby and then I plan on getting two jobs and get out of here. Am I wrong to do this? I just can’t take it anymore. Someone please help me what should I do?
My daughter lives in NY with her boyfriend. I live in PA. My daughter dose not want to take the chance of loosing her child while she is here because of his drug use and him involving all of us with him serving his oldest son drinks.My daughters boyfriend all so feels the same way he is fed up.

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