How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

My son is 4 1/2 and has never known his biological father. His father has wanted nothing to do with him. Well I am expecting my second child and the father is activly invloved. My son is now asking me tons of questions about who his daddy is and I’m not sure what to do or say. His father was a drug addict and and alcoholic and I have not since talked to him so I don’t know that he is any different. In fact I don’t even know how to get ahold of him. I want my son to know as much as he wants but I am not sure what is took much for a 4 year old to understand. I have told him his name but he is constantly asking me questions that I am not sure how to answer. Any ideas?

my ex/son’s father is a drunk. He’s around my son just about on a daily basis and sees him drinking beer/liqour on a daily basis. His father was a drunk just the same. I don’t want to be the one to keep him from being around his father, but I know him seeing him drink daily will instill the same alcoholic tendencies in him when he gets older. His father won’t keep the alcohol hidden or away and it’s gotten so bad, my 3 yr old can spot a beer product from a mile away. I’ve told my son, beer is bad, and ppl should not drink it, but for a boy who idolizes his father, how can I make it so he sees it in a bad light? He already wants his dad to leave when he sees him pop open a bottle of whatever because he knows his father will start his drunken tyrrads. what can i do or say to my son to prevent him from becoming a drunk monster like his dad??

Lately he’s been asking me for him and about him. I try to be very careful what I do tell him. His father is an alcoholic and has deteriorated in mind and soul. I eventually cut all ties with him when he could not stay out of prison for being out of control.That was 3 years ago.

My son’s father has not had any contact with me since I was 4 months pregnate, by his own choice. He has no idea when my son was born or even what his name is. He is not even on the birth certificate because state law mandates that the father be present to have his name on the birth certificate. I would like to patition the courts for formal custody, just in case his father ever decides to track me down. But I am not 100% sure he is the father and I know the courts will want a fathers name and they will seek a paturnity test if I am not positive on who the father is. My major problem is the other possible father know the man who I’m pretty sure is my son’s father. I was in contact with him awhile back but he made no effort to help pay for a paturnity test and didn’t want to see my son unless he knew for sure that he was the father. SO how do I get formal custody from the courts without the potencial daddies finding out. #1 is a druggie and alcoholic #2 is a good guy and a great father.

I called CPS, they did a full investigation, and have ruled the home a safe place to stay. The parents are alcoholics and they verbally, and physically abuse all four children. I am the 3rd person to call CPS and each time, they allowed the kids to stay

My sons dad and I were never married. We separated almost a year ago. He is an alcoholic and has lost everything. He doesn’t even have a home. He hasn’t seen his son regularly for about 2 months. He recently decided that he wants to move back to his home town which is 1500 miles away. How do I break the news to my son? Is he going to understand? How do i keep him from having abandonment issues? I am not sure if his dad will keep contact because he hasn’t done that well when he is in town. Any ideas?

My son’s father came back into our life after 6 years. He was a big drugy.
He has been clean for 2 years.

I made a promise to myself to keeo moving forward and discuss or dwell in the past.

Things have been going well. He is shaping up to be a great dad and my son loves as if he was never away.

He and I are getting a long swimmingly. I even thought we were friends. He calls me almost everyday and talks about his day, talks to me about our son, etc. He even confides in me.

BTW we were each others first like real love. We were together 5 years before we split.

On Friday night he called me to hang out together. My son was sleeping over his aunts so I excepted I mean we have known each other since we were 13. He asked me once before but I was busy.

So he told me was madly in love with me back then.

Then his stupid ass kissed me. Then I went to pick up my sons bike from his house and he tells me he had a good time the other night.

Ummm, did I mention he has been dating someone for 2 years? He says he doesn’t love her.

Bottom line is I know he loves me. He always has and always will. I’ve always trumped any women in his life including his mother. I would almost feel bad for his gf but turns out she is crazy.

It must be hard to see him look at me the way he does. As girlfriend to see the way he speaks to me and treats me. Honestly, if he hadn’t got hooked on drugs and done all the ish we’d still be together I think.

I don’t know how I feel about him. I get a sense that he still has a bit of liar in him left over from his drugy days.

What do you think go with the gut or give him a chance? He hasn’t given me any reason not to believe him since he has been back.

Hmmmm, opinions, advice, etc?

Yes this is really happening! Lol, I know my life is like some dramatic comedic movie, lol.
Artmom, I would see your point about his current gf except I meant it literally when I said she is crazy. He has had a restraining order against her and she is a drug user. She has stepped on my toes many times trying to get in good with my son. I did not appreciate that.
Lol, I am not putting up with anything.

I do not want him back but I know he wants me back. I guess I was kind of confused when I wrote this.

I guess I mean should I continue to be his friend even though he is still in love with me?
@Dogma: Lol, I know how this question must sound. There is much more to the story and much more to our history together but it’s to much to write. His gf? I have no sympathy for her. She is a dope fiend and has 2 lovely girls that she just got taken away from her due to a drug habit.

Again I don’t want to be with him though I know he wants to be with me. The question is more can I continue to be friends with him though he is still in love with me?
@PullMyEFinger: Thank you for actually giving some useful advice!!

Please help, I am running out of time. My son is 18. He got a DWI while living with his father, he didn’t even have his DL yet. He stole my car while visiting and ran it in the ditch with a .234 BAC. He decided to come home and stay with me so he can get a job, get clean from marijuana and get his life together. He loves and worries about his dad who is a functional alcoholic. His dad is working nights and in order to see him at all he has to go to bar in the morning to visit before he goes home to sleep it off and go to work that night. His step mom condones this behavior. I want to just get angry and tell my son no, but I don’t want to push him away. He has been home about a week and this is the first time he went to see his dad. It is not his fault his dad is that way and he wants to see him. How can I open his eyes and let him know he should not be anywhere near a bar while trying to clean up his on act and with pending court dates and fines. It hurts so bad and I try not to show him, but he knows. I want to help him SO badly.

he is ruining his life. He got caught selling illegal drugs and was sentenced to 10 yrs., but he only had to serve served 1 yr in prison and probation.Hes been out for less than a yr, and he is still on probation. He started drinking about 6 months ago again, and now he is hanging around with the bad guys again. I have talked to him several times, and all he can say is I know dad, I will try to stop. He got caught once by his probation officer, and he let him off the hook, but now is back to doing drugs also. Plz advise. I am so worried about him. The next time he is caught he will have to serve the rest of his 10 yrs..
My son is 26 yrs old. His mother and I are divorced have been since 1989.
My son does not live with me. He lives with a girl that still does drugs. He was living with mother for a while, but returned to the gf’s house.

my son’s father is a pathalogical liar and uses his children as pawns in his chess game of…getting attention from women, lying, cheating, etc. he’s has a serious selfish problem. he and i were together for six years and in those six years he subjected his children to at least 2 other women and their kids. Now he’s attempting to subject my son to his “new” girlfriend who he met in AA. she’s a pediatric nurse mother of three and a Narcotics Addict. the last girl he cheated on me with thought he lived alone and had this little old dog, for a year he lied to her and continuously took his three kids (one of them, my 3 yr old son) over to her house. While in wal-mart one day, his oldest son, Jamesy asked him, “Daddy, why do you lie to lizzy about where we are going? Daddy why do you live with lizzy when you are seeing Dawn” he told jamesy, “i promise james, i’ll quit cheating on lizzy” at the same time he was buying flowers and asked jamesy to give them to dawn so it looked less romantic and cuter. she bought it. she and i met when he finally checked into detox. Alcohol is just one outlet of his manic ways. he’s up right now and living in vegas “acting” like he’s a changed man. But he’s left two voicemails in the last week and i can tell he has been drinking again. he’s now got his new girlfriend harassing me over texts. i want him to have “supervised” visitation if any at all. right now his eldest son is in counseling at school. he’s 9. he has panic attacks over his dad. he loves his daddy but his daddy has asked him to lie and keep quiet about where they go etc. he’s tells a good lie. i’m afraid the mediator will give him unsupervised visitation when he comes to visit from vegas. we’re in illinois. what are the chances that i can prove he subjects his children to immoral situations. what do i have to do to get my ducks in a row to prove his judgement is impaired. do i need statements from past women, his ex-wife, his eldest son’s school counselor? right now it just looks like we’re all angry women. but i’m trying to protect my child from being hurt like his eldest brother is hurting. HELP.

This man is 46, drinking himself into oblivion daily, has suffered broken ribs, black eyes, and coughing up blood all in the past month. We live in plymouth county massachusetts. how do we have him ‘sectioned’? (son is 22)

My son goes over there on weekend (court ordered). I found out in september that my son’s uncle is living there with him and he is recovering from meth. How can I get my son’s dad to realize that his brother in law is a meth addict and will always be one