How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

I’m 24 years old with a 4 year old child. I make $12 an hour as a temp and will soon get hired through the company and my pay will go up to $16, I also work overtime some nights to be able to provide for my child with everything he needs. 6 months ago I moved down here with my son from Idaho when our husband abandoned us. Our plan was to all move down to California to help my mom out with her breast cancer and I had half the house packed..Then he cheated on me…Then he left me, took our only car and his clothes. I had no car and at the time my job cut my hours to 4 hours a week cause of the economy. So my son and I moved, my husband didnt contact us for those 5 days. We moved on the 6th day.

I’ve tried to keep in contact with him over the months and keep it friendly and tell him updates about our son. After I stopped calling him, he rarely called me…Once every 2 months..

Now he is mad that I decided not to move back to Idaho and says I’ve “kidnapped our son” when he knew we were moving down to Cali and he had no problem all those other months! He is a pothead and he is very immature and not responsible enough to care for our son.

I think I need a lawyer and I was wondering if anyone can recommend one in the L.A. area who would be able to do payment plans since I don’t have much money.

I told my husband I don’t have a problem with him visiting our son. I have no family in Idaho. And my son gets alot of love and support down here from my side of the family.
I just don’t want my son staying with my husband since him and his girlfriend are both alcoholics and potheads… I just don’t know how to prove that without the help of a lawyer

I’m so scared about losing my son by him saying I kidnapped him when I did not!

My divorce was final yesterday and I’ve been dating someone… He’s every thing I want in a man and treats me with respect unlike my abusive and alcoholic ex. My son (not of the marriage) is five and absolutely loves him and wants us to get married…should I spend more time alone and casually date for a while before committing to a relationship? I really could settle down with this guy but am afraid of getting into another relationship without making sure I am healthy first. HELP!

After a 20 year marriage where drinking was an issue at times but the last year was drowned in crystal meth I left my then husband to protect my children. They are now young adults. I never went through the final chapter because he threatened to take my then teenage son away. I was stupid enough to believe that could happen. I know the answer already.

I am a stay-at-home mom and am divorcing my alcoholic husband. At present, the alimony & child support I will receive won’t be enough to continue caring for my son full-time. I’ll have to put him in daycare 9 hours a day to make ends meet (I DON’T want to do that!).
Here is the question…My husband is being considered for a new job where he will make $50,000 more per year! If I wait to file for divorce until he starts this new job, will I receive more in child support and alimony? I wonder mainly because we’ve been separated for 4 months and I don’t know if the courts will look at his income at the time of separation or at the time the divorce is filed.
I know some nasty person is going to call me money grubbing, but this is ALL about avoiding putting my young son in daycare all day long when he’s used to being at home with me. I’ll be working full-time as soon as he’s in regular school.
Thanks!

I am a stay-at-home mom and am divorcing my alcoholic husband. At present, the alimony & child support I will receive won’t be enough to continue caring for my son full-time. I’ll have to put him in daycare 9 hours a day to make ends meet (I DON’T want to do that!).
Here is the question…My husband is being considered for a new job where he will make $50,000 more per year! If I wait to file for divorce until he starts this new job, will I receive more in child support and alimony? I wonder mainly because we’ve been separated for 4 months and I don’t know if the courts will look at his income at the time of separation or at the time the divorce is filed.
I know some nasty person is going to call me money grubbing, but this is ALL about avoiding putting my young son in daycare all day long when he’s used to being at home with me. I’ll be working full-time as soon as he’s in regular school.
Thanks!

I am a stay-at-home mom and am divorcing my alcoholic husband. At present, the alimony & child support I will receive won’t be enough to continue caring for my son full-time. I’ll have to put him in daycare 9 hours a day to make ends meet (I DON’T want to do that!).
Here is the question…My husband is being considered for a new job where he will make $50,000 more per year! If I wait to file for divorce until he starts this new job, will I receive more in child support and alimony? I wonder mainly because we’ve been separated for 4 months and I don’t know if the courts will look at his income at the time of separation or at the time the divorce is filed.
I know some nasty person is going to call me money grubbing, but this is ALL about avoiding putting my young son in daycare all day long when he’s used to being at home with me. I’ll be working full-time as soon as he’s in regular school.
Thanks!

I am a stay-at-home mom and am divorcing my alcoholic husband. At present, the alimony & child support I will receive won’t be enough to continue caring for my son full-time. I’ll have to put him in daycare 9 hours a day to make ends meet (I DON’T want to do that!).
Here is the question…My husband is being considered for a new job where he will make $50,000 more per year! If I wait to file for divorce until he starts this new job, will I receive more in child support and alimony? I wonder mainly because we’ve been separated for 4 months and I don’t know if the courts will look at his income at the time of separation or at the time the divorce is filed.
I know some nasty person is going to call me money grubbing, but this is ALL about avoiding putting my young son in daycare all day long when he’s used to being at home with me. I’ll be working full-time as soon as he’s in regular school.
Thanks!

We have been married 3 years and i have finally know that i have to quit alcohol and save me my marriage and for our 22mo old son. She will not go to counseling because she thinks that my problem is the whole thing. I take accountabilty for my mistakes and trully want us to work.

I have been married to my husband for almost 2 years, and we have a 6 month old son. When we first met, he was a great man, but he changed as soon as he found out that I was pregnant. He went from staying at home and being a husband, to hanging out at bars and clubs every weekend all hours of the night. We separated 2 weeks after our son was born. He lives with his mom, he has no job, and any money he gets he spends on alcohol and marijuana, not our son. I know we took our vows for better or worse, but I cannot deal with him. He says he never goes out, but he still hangs out with his “friend” every day. She drinks and smokes weed as much as he does, and she is 18. I don’t understand why he is even “friends” with her when he will be 36 years old next month. I am 28 years old by the way. What do I do? I gave him an ultimatum to either be there for me and our son and clean up his act and stop being friends with her, or we will no longer be a family. Did I do the right thing? And can I get a divorce because of it?
Also, his mom has kicked him out of the house twice, one time being last week and he is crying to me to help him. He even let his “friend” attack me when I told her to mind her business because my husband and I had an argument. I pressed charges against her and he sat there and did nothing. Instead he ran away from the incident and said that he doesn’t get in female conflicts.
He even let her use his phone to text and call me harrassing me, and I cursed her out and told her not to call me again. I am so tired of this.

my mother has custody of our son that is 8 years old, because
my husband has a cocaine problem and has not been totally
cooperating with DSS, who still lives in our home. he is trying to get help, but still keeps coming up with dirty unrine tests. i want our son back in my custody, and do not feel it is fair for me to move out of our home to get my son back, why can’t he be forced to move out?

My ex and I split up nearly 2 years ago. He had been seeing our son nearly every week and said that when he left he left me “not our son”. Well, I haven’t heard from him for the past 4 months. I’m very confused and pretty livid for my son. He asks about him and I’m not sure what to say. I tell him that his father loves him and that I know he misses him.

Some people have mentioned that he’s probably in a new relationship but I still can’t understand how that would make him want to totally cut off all communication with his child who he was actively involved with up until 4 months ago.

I wonder if it could be drugs? He was very inconsistent over the summer when he was watching him. Would show up late most days, couldn’t seem to get himself up on time and would call with every excuse in the book day in and day out. He’s 35 years old and I know he did Meth recreationally before we got together, when he was 23. But he didn’t do that when we were together.

However, in the past year he’s lost his job (was fired after working there for 8 years) due to being late all the time. Said he was denied unemployment. And he’s just hanging out with 21 year old girls and has 2 bachelors living with him now.

I’m just trying to understand how someone can so completely change. I wonder why he wouldn’t be reachable or interested in seeing his own son for so long?

How can men (or people) do this to their children? Last we talked we were amicable and all was civil.
I have seen my ex driving around town, so he’s not incarcerated. He acts like he doesn’t see me. I texted him 3 months ago. Never heard back from him. I see that he’s adding friends to his facebook page, so I know he hasn’t fallen off the planet and isn’t in jail or worse.

I have known my husband since I was 16, (now 36). We have been together 7 years and married 2. When we first got together, we were both going out partying and having a good time on the weekends, that I did not have my son. On the days that my son was home, I did not drink but he did. It got to where he was drinking everyday and would drink until he would pass out. He admits to being an alcoholic and knows he has a problem. We have been working on our marriage for the last two years, started going to church. It has been a rough road, with lies, him hiding bottles around the house and everywhere else he thought I wouldn’t look, and lies about pills (hydrocodone-lortabs). In general, I feel our marriage has been one big lie…. but I love him. I have tried in every way to be as supportive as I know to be. He lost his job, went back to school and has earned his degree all during this hell we have been going through. He is now unemployed and I am working as many hours as my job will let me.
He had quit drinking for about the past three – four months and last Friday, he told me he was tired of sitting at home and was going out whether I liked it or not and went to a party where he knew he was going to get drunk. I told him that if he went it was over. He went and did not come home until 1 a.m. (didn’t drive) doesn’t remember coming home, and of course is now very apologetic all over again and saying he wants help and all the same stuff he always has said everytime this has happened before. I am so tired of going through this and I said for better or worse in sickness and health, but my mental health cannot handle much more of this. I feel like I am the only person who cares in this marriage and I am the only person willing to do whatever it takes and he is taking me down a road of pure hell. He says he loves me but it’s hard to believe when he keeps doing the same thing over and over hurting me over and over and making me feel like I don’t matter over and over. Sooo tired!
He went to AA but quit going and would sit in a parking lot when he was supposed to be there and drink. I honestly think the only way he will ever do anything is if he is admitted into a rehab, but we have no money and no insurance on him for treatment.
My son is from a previous marriage, my mother is dead. As for my enabling him, I used to two years ago, but I have not drank or given him or “let” him drink since then. It is his choice and that is where the hiding the bottles came into play. I am taking care of my son in every way, I work and pay the bills and put food on the table. I am a good mother and would be a good wife, but I feel like I am missing the husband to be a good wife to. I know he loves me, I don’t doubt that, it’s just that the alcohol is loved more. Sad to say. I am not defending his behaviour and I understand this is an illness, but cancer patients (which was what my mother was before she died) get treatment, he should too, but how?!!
I feel helpless and lost. What else am I supposed to do?
Is there any treatment centers that treat people with no insurance? Where could he get help if he wanted to? I have checked on AlAnon and have been online meetings. There are only AA meetings in my area and that includes everyone Alcoholics and the families, I don’t want to be around the alcoholics, because I have come to the point of not feeling any sympathy for them… I can’t anymore.

Briefly, my wife of 3yrs. & mother of my 2.5 yr.old, used crack cocaine. several x’s. now she says she has 60+ days clean. she just regained more visiting time for her 8 yr.old son which she lost 5yrs. ago, from prior heroin addiction. She’d been clean about 6yrs. prior. she’s now not allowed to see him by court order. she’s had both kids around drug users & dealers. when i was at work. she’s stole, lied, & cheated. she would’nt even keep a pt. time job, keep house clean & would’nt take very good care of our son. she’s bi-polar,depressed, on med’s for it. slept,smoked cig’s,talked on phone most of the day. i had to put him in daycare. she really did nothing. she’s now in her own apt. w/a female ex-felon (crack)w/a 15yr.drug use habit. I pd. for the first month rent just to get her out of the house. now she’s unable to pay rent. says she attends 2-3 N/A mtg’s. a day. Our son is w/me. she says she made a mistake.& wants to return home. how many chances does she have to get it right? w/me

my son was told by his wife’s attorney that she will get the house because she can prove he is an alcoholic

my wife is an alcoholic and doesn’t see that she is – so we’ve grown apart and don’t have much of a relationship now. Our son is now grown up and out of the house. If you have any experience with getting or trying to get a divorce in this situation I’d like your advice. My wife and I each have our own careers.

MY wife went to jail for crack possession and I am ready to divorce her. WE have been thru alot and its time to let her go. Is it possible to divorce her when she is in prison? She is an awful mother and would often smoke crack infront of my sons. After the abusive fights and the constant drinking I woke up and is now 13 days clean and Im ready to start over.

Ok i have been separated from my wife for a year have really only give her the space she wanted the last 5 months.I was a mean drunk to her and my son which i am ashamed off.But i have gotten into AA and i am in counseling about my anger and suicide attempts.I Truly love this woman and child with all my heart wished i could have done it before this happened but i did not.I know she made me a better man the day i meet her and even a better man the day she left me.Do not get me wrong i want her and my son back real bad just not sure how i can make this happen.If anyone has an advise please tell a stupid man what to do.And yes i know i am a stupid man for treating a amazing woman like shit.I have since tried to give her the space she wanted and even done stuff for her that i did not need to do.For example we hung-out Saturday with my son she said she was depressed about money and her job.So Sunday i went out and and bought her the Alisha Keys album with Superwoman on it .I really expected nothing but a heartfelt thank you.What i got was thanks as she through the CD on the passenger seat in almost disgust.Ok could this be the sign if a woman who hates me and loves another man.Or is this the reaction of a woman who is trying to show as little feelings as possible.
Oh yea she brings up the divorce almost everytime we get together.Read in a book that woman want closeier on stuff like this faster than men.Or is this a woman who already has someone on the side unsure this is why i am asking.