My step-daughter moved out west to be near her family who is trying, one last time, to help her get on her feet. Her deadbeat husband followed her out here and is now living in a shelter and gets food stamps and offers no support or help to his wife or his 3 small children, yet expects to see them and she allows it. He knows how her entire family feels about him and he avoids us like the plague. He’s not supposed to stay with her but we suspect he does from time to time. She got into a house recently that the local housing authority is paying the rent on and she is expected to at least get a part time job. She’s an emotionally abused woman and can’t turn him away because she feels he needs to see his kids. We have tried too many times to make her see what a bad influence he is. He does nothing but manipulate her and the system to survive and get what he wants. When he gets cleaned up and is responsible and his contributing THEN his reward should be to see her and his kids. She won’t give him that ultimatum. That falls on deaf ears. Nothing we suggest or share with her is effective. His presence may cause her to get kicked out of her home. He has arrest records and is wanted in another state for burglary and shoplifting. He’s actually skipped out on his parole and the police here and back there do know of his where-abouts but I guess he’s not important enough to extradite. He’s a drug addict and alcoholic who was even caught trying to steal beer from a local supermarket recently. My step-daughter was doing fine until the deadbeat showed up and now she can’t seem to move forward because he keeps interfering in her life. She may be spiraling out of control and the next step could be to lose her house and be on the street and the state would step in and take the kids. She has burned her bridges with her family for so many years. They have tried and tried and tried, spending thousands of dollars trying to help her but she messes it up over and over. She’s VERY stubborn and never listens to advice and has to learn everything the hard way. She’s 40 now and has nothing to show for her life other than 3 small children, whom she car barely handle and a deadbeat husband who showed up one day and is wrecking everything. I don’t know…maybe we should just sit back and let the chips fall where they may? That’s the only thing we haven’t done yet. Maybe she truly has to reach rock bottom for her, losing her kids, to make her see how serious the situation is.
Browsing Posts tagged convince
I practically beg him not to smoke inside but he still smokes in our sons bathoom (its not in his room-he’s three) and he smokes at the front door with the storm door barely cracked. He knows that secondhand smoke is dangerous but it’s like he doesn’t care. Our son was born with his lungs collapsed so I’m even more afraid of him smoking around him.(he didn’t smoke around me while I was pregnant though) How do I get him to stop? Am I overreacting? Is it really not that bad when he only does it a few times a day? And advice would be very much appreciated. Thank you.
Here’s the scoop. My husband of one year has a 34 year old son who is a Meth addict. He’s currently homeless. No job. Kicked out of the military. My husband feels sorry for his son’s homelessness and so informs me that he’s bringing him home to stay with us for a few months. He’s skinny as a rail, unclean, unshaven, and has track marks on his hand and up his arm from shooting up (fresh marks). I told my husband it wouldn’t work out for his son because he’s basically a street person and that’s his lifestyle. I told him that his son has to shower every night before bed. (He’s been here for a week and has showered once.) He’s eating us out of house and home! He helps himself to all the groceries and is doing nothing in return but staying in our guest bedroom and sleeping all day and night. The bedroom looks like a bomb went off in there. My husband gave him money for a haircut and also for cigarettes. I don’t trust the guy and only see him as a parasite using his father’s good will. None of his other family members want him around including his mother. How do I convince my husband of one year that this isn’t going to work? I fear for our marriage?
My best friend is 27 years old. She’s married to a 24 year old man. They get drunk almost daily. They have a 1 month old son, and she has an 8 year old daughter. They continuously get into fights. Fist fights, fights where he chokes her and tells her he’s going to kill her (no the police wont do anything unless she files a report…… and soc. services wont do anything without proof either, so dont suggest those two things to me)
So.. I’ve been trying to get them into AA for help but Its not working. Are there any other tactics or techniques that you can use to convince someone to get help? Thanks
He’s a musician and believes this behavior is normal.
Is alcoholism genetic? I’ve been asking that question to myself for months. I’m an alcoholic. I’ve already entered alcohol rehabs and received treatment but I still can’t get over it. I know alcoholism cannot be cured but I think I’m doing fine. I tried my best to stop myself from drinking and so far I’ve done a great job. I’m just worried about my son Ivan. He grew up in an environment where he sees his mother drinking alcohol everyday. He saw everything. He was there during the lowest point in my life and I loved him for not leaving me. I’m bothered by the fact that maybe he has inherited some sort of alcoholic genes. I don’t want him to end up like me. Oh, before I forget, his father is an alcoholic too.
