How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

My husband, myself and my son are furious. My parents never admitted they were alcoholics. I had discussion with my sister & she is supporting him? Why? We love them now that they aren’t drinking. I never thought I would have to beg my sister to support them.

My husband, myself and my son are furious. My parents never admitted they were alcoholics. I had discussion with my sister & she is supporting him? Why? We love them now that they aren’t drinking. I never thought I would have to beg my sister to support them.

My husband, myself and my son are furious. My parents never admitted they were alcoholics. I had discussion with my sister & she is supporting him? Why? We love them now that they aren’t drinking. I never thought I would have to beg my sister to support them.

mine died of cancer and blessed us with five small lots and an old mobile home. We live in this mobile now. My brother and his wife were infuriated and jealous and made it a point to hurt my husband and me in any way they could think of. They called CPS and accused my husband of molesting our nine-year-old daughter. (They were NEVER at our house!) My daughter was questioned by CPS and “they” determined that there was no evidence of molestation. DUH! We have grown sons and daughters and they were horrified that their dad and I went through this. This happened about two years ago, but it has come to my attention that this was kept in the files of CPS. WHY??? I am angry, upset, furious. No charges were ever filed against my husband. I am a stay-at-home mom. My husband works 12 hours a day in another town. He NEVER touched our daughter and never would. NO, I AM NOT IN DENIAL ABOUT THIS! Why does CPS keep something like this on record. What can we do? Anyone else had a similar experience?

5 children, and he is the youngest. 2 of us are step, 3 are biological to my step mother. we are now all grown up, Late 20′s and early 30′s. in highschool me and him hung out and were like best friends. did some trouble which i grew out of. He just kept doing more and more illegal stuff and got deep into drugs. oldest sister has a family with 3 very nice boys, other sister has always held a GREAT paying job which takes time away from her children (parents look down on this), older brother does construction and lives with otherside of his family. does well for himself but is not very family oriented, comes around when he wants to (with my family i understand why), Me…I am in the military, served 5 tours, 4 to Iraq 1 to afghanistan, own my own home, live comfortably with new cars and 2 amazingly well behaved happy children (I seem to be blamed for most drama and problems of step mothes life).. youngest son DID drugs, he has receintly served 6 months in a bootcamp style court mandated rehab (mother says he picked it to get help, he didnt want jail), he has not held down job, lived off welfare, did drugs, had a meth-lab in his 1yr old son’s room, and now just broke parol and left state to got to a concert where he got busted selling drugs. 5 felony counts. mother still thinks he is a wonderful father and very noble taking the full sentance because he didnt turn in his supplier and get a deal. keeps his family safe that way. I know the problem is with the step mother.. common denominator in ALL drama, but why does the pride still maily remain with the child that has gone nowhere? she even has a count of days he has served thus far… its offensive.

My little brothers wife died during child birth about a month ago he is 24 and she was 22. Well it was a beautiful baby boy and he is so adorable. Well me and my older sister and my parents have been going over a lot to check on the both. He hasn’t really been bonding with his son at all and he often just sleeps for super long periods of time and leaves his son in his crib. I went over today and he was passed out with a few bottles of alcohol next to him and his son was screaming. I am worried about them both to be honest. Well i fed my nephew and got his diaper changed and got him dressed and was cuddling with him when my brother came to and i asked him if he wants me to take his son for awhile so he can work through his grief and he got raging pissed at me and cussed at me and told me to leave and that no one can take his son.I don’t know what to do to be honest i am worried about my nephews safety and well being but my brother wont let me help him out. Advice?

I’ve just recently found out that my brother is stealing from my sickly ill mother, presently in the hospital, and abusing drugs-as confirmed by police as crack/cocaine. He lives with his 14 year old son, they don’t get along at all, and has abusive tendencies. Ever since my mother was diagnosed with Stg 4 Breast Cancer, with no recovery, he has been in a downward spiral. He confided in me that he is taking marijuana to offset the depression, however, as I visited the home to pick up a few things for my mom, he not only stole some of her clothing, jewelry and other family heirlooms, but I got so frustrated, maybe they were still in his room, I entered and found empty zip baggies with powder residue and small round burnt balls all around. Need help in making a drastic decision…call ACS, get him evicted, which means he will lose his job again, go to jail and devastate my mother even more, or should I wait, have a family intervention, because image matters to him, and wait it out?

He has stayed w/ my spouse, 18 yr old son on and off for past 20 yrs. Has been through 2 60 day treatment programs this year alone. Has worked on getting a a “good” job for over 2 mos. When he finally gets it, he relapses and screws it up. Our father, as well as his sponsor at AA both think he needs to be commited for at least 6 mos to a year. After a 6 day binge, he is willing to seek add’l help, but problem seems to always come up after he spends 2 mos. trying to get a job that once he gets it, he starts a binge, which is precisely what just happened. My husband no longer wants him to stay w/ us, he has no home, needs further treatment. I have researched what it takes to commit someone, but since he is willing to go for treatment, not an issue. Our dad thinks we can commit him and then we be the one to judge when he can be released. I have been his #1 enabler, but NO MORE. How to explain to dad this is not how commitment works? Can print out variety of research. HELP PLEASE!!
One major thing that presents a big obstacle is that my brother has not been able to work for approx. past 7 years. Therefore, he is homeless! He never has been able to follow through with any type of after care treatment when we allow him to stay with us. When he relapses, it causes a great deal of havoc within our home, so NO MORE staying w/ us. Has had 2 relapses after his last 60 day treatment program which ended only 2 mos. ago. With no job, no insurance, he is only entitled to state sponsored rehab programs. To me, he needs to address psychological issues MORE than his alcoholic tendencies. ANY SUGGESTIONS OTHER THAN THE OBVIOUS ONES OF ME ATTENDING AL-ANON, OF CEASING TO BE HIS ENABLER ARE MORE THAN WELCOME!!! THANKS A BUNCH !!!
As of latest writing of this question, brother is once again going to go into treatment center/rehab for his alcholism…..do they provide adequate mental health counselling in these rehabs? Think he needs to focus more on the psychological issues he has that perhaps can lead him to drink…..any suggestions???

He has stayed w/ my spouse, 18 yr old son on and off for past 20 yrs. Has been through 2 60 day treatment programs this year alone. Has worked on getting a a “good” job for over 2 mos. When he finally gets it, he relapses and screws it up. Our father, as well as his sponsor at AA both think he needs to be commited for at least 6 mos to a year. After a 6 day binge, he is willing to seek add’l help, but problem seems to always come up after he spends 2 mos. trying to get a job that once he gets it, he starts a binge, which is precisely what just happened. My husband no longer wants him to stay w/ us, he has no home, needs further treatment. I have researched what it takes to commit someone, but since he is willing to go for treatment, not an issue. Our dad thinks we can commit him and then we be the one to judge when he can be released. I have been his #1 enabler, but NO MORE. How to explain to dad this is not how commitment works? Can print out variety of research. HELP PLEASE!!
One major thing that presents a big obstacle is that my brother has not been able to work for approx. past 7 years. Therefore, he is homeless! He never has been able to follow through with any type of after care treatment when we allow him to stay with us. When he relapses, it causes a great deal of havoc within our home, so NO MORE staying w/ us. Has had 2 relapses after his last 60 day treatment program which ended only 2 mos. ago. With no job, no insurance, he is only entitled to state sponsored rehab programs. To me, he needs to address psychological issues MORE than his alcoholic tendencies. ANY SUGGESTIONS OTHER THAN THE OBVIOUS ONES OF ME ATTENDING AL-ANON, OF CEASING TO BE HIS ENABLER ARE MORE THAN WELCOME!!! THANKS A BUNCH !!!
As of latest writing of this question, brother is once again going to go into treatment center/rehab for his alcholism…..do they provide adequate mental health counselling in these rehabs? Think he needs to focus more on the psychological issues he has that perhaps can lead him to drink…..any suggestions???

I am 43. My brother is 45. We went to his house for memorial weekend and he allowed his neighbor to snort cocaine in the bathroom with my son and grand daughter in the next room. We left and told him how extremely irate we were and he laughed about it. I have not spoke to my brother in 2 years and my mom is so upset that I won’t just forget about that whole thing. He still has not apologized and at my moms he said he thought it was funny. So needless to say, when there is a family thing, we are the ones who don’t get invited. My son and grand daughter are 12 and 5. Nobody except my brother is a drinker. Am I right to be outraged?

He’s 56, been unemployed (by choice – he quit his last job over a year ago and did nothing to find work). He’s an alcoholic. He’s fixing to lose his house, his phone has been cut off, he has no money, he’s pawned everything and is now calling me to help. He’s made up a story that he’s got lung cancer and he’s dying to get sympathy. He’s never gone to a doctor to get it confirmed yet used this excuse to sit around his house doing nothing. He still smokes and drinks. I was giving him a little bit of money for groceries but realized I’m just enabling him. I’m scared he’s going to show up on my doorstep wanting to a place to stay. I’ll have to turn him away because I cannot allow him to ruin me and my son’s life. I’ve worked too hard for the things I have as a single widowed mother. I’m disgusted my brother has done nothing for himself and asks for my help. I can’t bring myself to help him anymore. He has sat around doing nothing for himself over a year and now he’s lost it all. He has no money to his name whatsoever. Anyone else dealt with an alcoholic family member this bad off?

My mother is an elderly 77 yr old who enables my alcoholic brother
all lthe time, last year I decided to distance myself from him and his
family cause hes an abusive son of a ……
But now the latest news is that my brother asked mymother to travel
here to US, mind you its almost 15 hrs. on the bus because he
convinced her somehow that he wants to change his life, meaning
stop drinking, hes done this dozens of times and never ever stops
I tell my mom to stop dreaming, hes a 40 yr old man and you cannot
save him he has to make the commitment on his own, wht you guys
think about this? So when I ask my mom to stay out, she starts that
I never cared ab out him, you know trying to make me feel guilty.
I just get so upset and tired, hes been drinking since 15 yrs old and
she never did anything to stop it. Sometimes I feel like if she werent
my mother, id slap her across the face, she says that its because
I dont know what it is to have a problem child, I say hes not a child
anymore, HES 40 you moron, an everytime she comes its the same
pattern, she comes over, he getsmad at her by the 2nd. day and
curses her out and then she wants to come to my house. I already
know whats going to happen. If this happens, my husband says
she is not coming over the house, this time, you better not opent hat
door, im tired of the fighting and youre brother.? Should I dothis for
her to learn her lesson.? Im even getting physically sick and stressed

HE HAS LOST TONS OF WEIGHT! His girlfriend and son left him he lost his appartment. So he moved in with my parents. My mom just found out he got into her bank account used checks and credit card. What can I do or tell my mom to make her feel better what can she do?!

My brother is almost 50 years old and an alcoholic. He has had numerous DWI’s and no longer owns a driver’s license, but owns 4 cars which are parked in front of my parent’s house where he lives in the back garage with his wife.They do not pay rent or bills. He doesn’t drive any of his vehicles, he only changes the tires out when they rot. They have lived there for about 18 years now and I don’t think they have any intention of leaving. To make matters worse, during his marriage, he got another woman pregnant and my parents raised his daughter(by this time she was 4), while he told his wife it was our deceased brother’s daughter. She is 17 years old now and completely feels regected by him. He comes into my parent’s house and doesn’t say a word to anyone. He has the ability to make something of himself but he just chooses not to. They completely take advantage of my mother. But my mother allows it. She just says she can’t bring herself to put her own son out on the street.

I’m a widowed single mom who’s worked hard to provide a good home to my son. I’ve had to save up for everything and live in a small townhome and work hard at my job. Life is finally stable for me and my son and I’m making decent money and things are good. I’ve survived the loss of my husband and entire family – all except one brother. That brother has always been an abusive alcoholic (he’s 9 years older than me). He quit his job over a year ago and has done nothing but sit around and drink beer and become severely depressed. He couldn’t find a job and gave up by saying his doctor diagnosed him with lung cancer so that’s why he can’t work. He says he gets tired easily and can’t breathe. The doctor/cancer excuse is a total lie – I called his doctor and he said he never ‘diagnosed him with anything” just told him to quit smoking. My brother has no money left, his house is going to be foreclosed on – he’s destitute. I cannot let him move in with me and turn my life into hell. When he drinks he’s abusive and beligerant. He’s a full blown alcoholic and he lies about everything to the point I don’t believe anything he says. My question is .. I can’t help him, take care of him or allow him to move in with me. I’m his only family member. How do I tell him “NO, you’ll have to go live under a bridge because I’m not taking care of you or letting you move in with me”. I have no sympathy for him because he brought this on himself by doing absolutely nothing for over a year but feel sorry for himself and get drunk. He’s lost it all and expects me to rescue him. I can’t give up everything I’ve worked so hard for – I’ve finally got my life stable for me and my son. Am I being cruel to turn my back on him? He really did me wrong many times and he turned his back on me ALOT. When I was widowed with a new baby – he did nothing to help me. All these years I’ve survived and raise my son alone with no help from anyone. He kicked me when I was down many times so it’s hard for me to have any sympathy for a lazy, self centered drunk brother. He’s got a neighbor feeling sorry for him and feeding him and she keeps calling me to tell me how he’s such a good guy and he needs help. I want to tell her to mind her own business – I don’t know this lady and how dare she call me telling me to come take care of him. He’s 55 years old, divorced with no children and he can’t do a damn thing for himself except sit and drink and lose everything he owns because he’s lazy and wants everyone to think he’s dying of cancer. How do I turn my back on my own brother without feeling guilty and being manipulated?

It all started a year and a half ago when he claimed he was laid off at his job at a small airport (he fueled airplanes). He had complained the job was too physical but he’s been a heavy smoker and drinker his entire life so quit the job. After that he spent a year and a half doing nothing. He used up all his savings, pawned everything of value he had except his house and his car. Six months ago he claimed he had lung cancer and only had months to live. He wrote a will and gave me the title to his truck. I first felt sorry for him and was giving him money and buying him groceries, etc. Listening to his drama about how he’s coughing up blood and has no energy. I soon learned this was all a ploy to suck money out of me. When I’d go visit him he’s been able to walk and talk and move around just fine. Not a cancer victim on death’s doorstep by no means. He’s been mooching off al l his neighbors, his utilities are now being disconnected and I think his house is being foreclosed on. A while back I told him he needed to apply for disability or welfare but he claims he can’t because he has no proof he’s dying! Duh. So he’s destitute. Last week he calls me asking for money (he sounded perfectly fine on the phone). I told him I had no money to lend him (I’m a single mom – I’m trying to survive myself). I know the money I lend him goes for cigarettes and beer. I told him I couldn’t support him financially so today he calls wanting the title back to his car. Which is fine – I didn’t want his car to begin with. I think he wanted me to put his car in my name so he could use that as a bargaining tool “I gave you my car – you now need to take care of me”. He’s been an alcoholic is entire life and has done nothing in the last year and a half but sit at home and tell everyone he’s dying of cancer. He’s made no attempts to find a job (said he can’t because he loses his energy after 15 minutes). He’s not dying, he’s not disabled, he’s just dug a hole he can’t get out of because he’s sat for over a year drinking and spending every last dime he has and feeling sorry for himself. I’ve been working my tail off to support me and my son, I’m unable to help him. He refused to help me back when my husband died and I lost my job – he asked me to move in his house with him then one night got drunk and kicked me and my son out on the street. He was abusive and vulgar towards me and my son. He’s been vulgar towards me even when he’s not drunk. He’s never been a brother. He’s a weak person who is self destructing quickly. I think the title to his car was a master manipulation to suck me in and now that I won’t give him money he wants it back. He needs to sell his car if he’s desperate for money. I don’t want anything from him. Why is he doing this to me? I’m his little sister – I went through hell when my husband died and left me with a baby. I’ve managed to get back on my feet and have a decent job and I am supporting me and my son but I cannot take on a 55 year old alcoholic abusive manipulative brother. It would be different if he was not faking cancer and has done absolutely nothing to help himself. Do I stand my ground?

my 19 year old brother does weed..i found out by going threw his phone..and its very ovious..he DOESNT have a job..and he lives at home with mom and i. (im 13.] and my best friend told me that he sold some to her dads friends son..adn he told my friends dad..and i went over to my cousins and they where getting high and they told me that he does weed and that hes a dealer. hes always ben my hero. he ALWAYS tells me not to do drugs..NEVER to smoke and drink..but he smokes ciggars..drinks.., AND hes on weed. i kno weeds not the worst thing in the world..but still. he was going to collage for law inforcement…but he didnt pass the drug test..i talked to my brother about how i knew and he told me that it wasnt ok and that hes sorry..he doesnt kno that i kno that hes a dealer though..i told my mom that he does..and i told her that hes a dealer..she was shocked..but if u put everything together..it makes sence..

one time he came home and his eyes where SOOO bloodshot.
u could just tell.
EVERYONE knows that hes on weed.

i love my brother SOO much.., so how can i get him to stop.???!
hes ruining his life..adn i CANT jsut sit here and watch. i mean now hes dealing weed..what if he turns into a crack head like my uncle.???

(i dont wanna tell him that i know hes a dealer..maybe later on in life..but not now.]

THANK YOU SOO MUCH IN ADVACE. ANYY advice would be appreacited.

my 19 year old brother does weed..i found out by going threw his phone..and its very ovious..he DOESNT have a job..and he lives at home with mom and i. (im 13.] and my best friend told me that he sold some to her dads friends son..adn he told my friends dad..and i went over to my cousins and they where getting high and they told me that he does weed and that hes a dealer. hes always ben my hero. he ALWAYS tells me not to do drugs..NEVER to smoke and drink..but he smokes ciggars..drinks.., AND hes on weed. i kno weeds not the worst thing in the world..but still. he was going to collage for law inforcement…but he didnt pass the drug test..i talked to my brother about how i knew and he told me that it wasnt ok and that hes sorry..he doesnt kno that i kno that hes a dealer though..i told my mom that he does..and i told her that hes a dealer..she was shocked..but if u put everything together..it makes sence..

one time he came home and his eyes where SOOO bloodshot.
u could just tell.
EVERYONE knows that hes on weed.

i love my brother SOO much.., so how can i get him to stop.???!
hes ruining his life..adn i CANT jsut sit here and watch. i mean now hes dealing weed..what if he turns into a crack head like my uncle.???

(i dont wanna tell him that i know hes a dealer..maybe later on in life..but not now.]

THANK YOU SOO MUCH IN ADVACE. ANYY advice would be appreacited.

I have allowed my younger brother to live with myself, my fiance, and my newborn son. He does pay rent, but a much smaller portion than we do. I have repeatedly asked him to not smoke his pot in the house, especially when the baby is home. He also smokes cigarettes, but always outside. I understand his reluctance to smoke pot outside, but he has many friend’s houses he could go to. I feel very betrayed that he consistently chooses drugs over his nephew. It culminated the other night, and I took my son and slept at my parents house, just to get him away. I have not spoken to my brother since (he is on vacation for a week), but I cannot allow this to go on around my child. At the same time, I do not want to give up on my brother because I know he does this to avoid dealing with personal tragedies. I can’t ask him to stop smoking, he is an adult and an admitted addict, but he WILL not do it in the vincinity of my child. Is this a lost cause, and am I going to have to kick him out?

I got a phonecall this morning, I was informed that My son’s older foster brother (17) passed away yesterday from a drug overdose. I’ve never met him before, but I do know they grew up together from an early age and both lived with the same family, and my son has also told me about him.

I haven’t told him yet…He’s been so happy with life lately and I just don’t want to break his heart by telling him the news. This is going to really hurt him and I know it, from what I know they were quite close until I adopted him last October and they haven’t talked since then. Another point that might make things even worse for him is that his mom before me was a meth addict…He died from a meth overdose. There has only been bad memories with my son and his other mom, she was abusive and neglectful, and from what I heard would go insane when she wasn’t high.

What would be the best way I can approach him with this, and help him cope with this?I’m a single mom, so I’ll have to give all the support I possibly can. He’s sensitive and he’s also still only 14, I know this is really going to be hard on him.