How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

My friend is in her late 20′s she has 3 dui’s she has a parole violation. She is a bad person who only cares about her self. She has a major drinking problem too, her brother died from a drunk driver. She is currently dating a man who is pushing 40. He used to be an alcoholic he stoppted because he doesn’t want to lose his 10 year old son.

He is good and clean now he hates drinking and alcohol. My friend drinks behind his back. Because she is bored and she says needs to be bad once and a while. They live together the last time she got drunk. He told if she does it again it’s over. She said she won’t do it again but she has hit the bottle four times since then. She quit her job and is looking for a new one. So far she hasn’t been looking she just sitting around the house getting bored and wanting to drink. I told her to stop because he is a nice man. He is letting her live with him for free and he takes her out and everything. After all this she still drinks behind his back.

March 12th was the 5th Year my dad has been gone.
He passed away because of his 15+ years of drug usage, along with a few other things…

So For this Anniversary, we had a family dinner with all the kids and grand kids, but my sister and her son couldn’t make it..
So After the nice evening My mom and i decided to go out to her house to make sure everything was okay. Where she proceeded to tell us her son, who is 20 is now addicted to drugs and she couldn’t come because he was all F*ucked up and stood her up.

So Long story short we’ve spent the last weak looking for him, he hasn’t come home, we’ve checked all his hangouts and Still can’t seem to catch up with him.. + He is now dating a 33yr old drug addict who is married.

Anyways, he has been my best friend and even though we haven’t always gotten to be together we are tight and i love him very much.. Im so worried.

Any Advice would help on how to find him and help him get back on track, off the streets and off the drugs?!

Or is this out of my hands?

My friend is in her late 20′s she has 3 dui’s she has a parole violation. She is a bad person who only cares about her self. She has a major drinking problem too, her brother died from a drunk driver. She is currently dating a man who is pushing 40. He used to be an alcoholic he stoppted because he doesn’t want to lose his 10 year old son.

He is good and clean now he hates drinking and alcohol. My friend drinks behind his back. Because she is bored and she says needs to be bad once and a while. They live together the last time she got drunk. He told if she does it again it’s over. She said she won’t do it again but she has hit the bottle four times since then. She quit her job and is looking for a new one. So far she hasn’t been looking she just sitting around the house getting bored and wanting to drink. I told her to stop because he is a nice man. He is letting her live with him for free and he takes her out and everything. After all this she still drinks behind his back.

A while ago, I met a guy and I really started liking him because he was interesting and strong. He’s a soldier. He spent four years in the marine corps and just finished his service. He’s a patriotic hero that fought in Iraq and Afghanistan. He seems to have control over his goals. He accomplishes his goals which is great, but there’s one HUGE unfortunate problem. He drinks excessively. He drinks every single night. Sometimes he will just be drunk all day. He will wake up just thinking about when he’ll get drunk again that day. He’s an alcoholic. I feel so horrible because before he became an alcoholic, he was a son, best friend, brother, soldier, and he’ll always be a hero. Now, his best friend doesn’t even want to be best friends with him anymore. The other day his brother did something nice for him and he yelled at his brother in the nastiest way afterward. He’s told me many times before that he drinks to forget all of the things he saw and experienced. I don’t think he received any therapy, maybe 3 sessions or so, but would that ever help someone get over the atrocities they experienced? not even close.

I wanted things to work out between us so badly, but he doesn’t have his priorities straight with himself. It seems that when it comes to his goals, alcohol hasnt gotten in the way yet, but his relationships seem to be deteriorating rather quickly. He’s also become a pathological liar.

The other day he told me his liver was hurting which freaked me out. I know it seems rather crazy that I am attracted to this guy…..what i see is this:
I see a guy that has incredible potential. He’s intelligent. If he wouldn’t get drunk, he wouldn’t miss out on becoming even more intelligent or wise from personal experiences.
He can be so sweet. He has such a good heart.

bottom line though….
He doesn’t care about anybody else anymore. He’s become really self-centered. I know this is because he’s probably resentful of what he has to go through every night and maybe not many of his friends understand. He drinks excessively and has to avoid how other people feel about it;ergo, he probably forces himself not to care. He needs help and he is as stubborn as they come.

I don’t know what the hell to do about this. I’m not sure I can because I think he hates me now. He lied to me and hurt me. I spoke to his best friend about it and his best friend called him to yell at him about it. So, I’ve been told to just stay away. This is where it gets messy. I’m the type of person who can not control emotions. My whole routine gets screwed up when a guy hurts me. I don’t feel like doing anything. I’m not strong enough for this. Someone else should do it but I don’t know if anyone cares enough to do anything. We have hooked up, and i get excited everytime we do because i think oh maybe this time it will work out……it never does. he simply doesn’t give two craps about me. should you ever stop caring even if they dont care for you? at what point do i look out for myself? do i stay away? I’m scared he’s killing himself slowly. who says “my liver hurts?”

When im with him i see glimpses of who he really is. when i first met him he was a lot nicer…now that hes back for good, he seems so damn self centered and drunk all the time. the things he talks about sometimes are things that have no importance like material things.

back to the liver part, when he told me his liver was hurting…i said “oh my gosh, are you serious?” a look of terror came over my face and i said “stop drinking….thats horrible” of course i know that wouldnt change anything but nothing else came to mind i just felt horrible and scared. then he just was a little annoyed but not mad and said “oh my God, you’re worse then my mom!” and i just looked at him and said “wouldn’t it be weird if I didn’t care?” and this look of perplexity came over his face.

anyway not sure i can do anything…..he doesnt care enough about me. he isn’t himself. he probably needs an intervention…..i dont know what to do…..i know my grammar and spelling is off, but i just had to get this story out as fast as i could. if you have anymore questions about this guy or whatever ask and i will answer you.

p.s I wrote this initially seeking help for myself because i feel let down, but there are other people who need more help then me…..like this soldier here.

My son has had an alcohol problems for seventeen years. He has survived three near death accidents, went through a six month rehab program, was clean for 1 1/2 years, and is now drunk again and unable to keep a job.

I have told him that “if this is the way you choose to live, I will not be part of it”. My problem is that, because twice I found him near death according to the doctors, I am afraid of not trying to keep in touch. He goes for days without answering his phone which I pay for because he has no one in his life anymore – not even a friend. I am afraid he will be found dead, and don’t know how I would handle the guilt an pain for not contacting him.

He graduated high school with a computer tech I certificate. I sent him to live with his Father, but Dad is in and out of town on work alot. SOn is partying then and inviting up buddies last wk while dad out of town

I have two teenagers who I am scared to death of them falling in to the sex, drugs, and alcohol consuming culture. Most of all gangs and the like. I have told the kids about the dangers of all three areas, but am I doing enough? I try to lead by example, but is that still enough? Please advise.

I have a friend that has a son that is going in for a drug test by urine. He has been taking niacin and vit C pills and drinking green tea detox and about 2-3 gallons of water each day. He smoked a little a week ago and started taking these things 3 days ago. What are his chances for passing the urine drug test. They both are worried and have checked the internet for answers and can not find any certain answers