Well, you’re gonna be upset, i would suggest visiting a pastor and reading the Bible, try John, and praying God will help you

He might try suicide so be aware if he is going out alone or cutting himself. And it could be like it was only last night(or moning/day) that he diedso0 yes it could be normal. TRy going to anothercity for conseling.

this is really ifu looking to son can’t finde he’s father……i will tell u something…………u r amother….thinked how u do to make him happy …… and how him forget he’s father…….see what’s he’s love…..and do it to him…mabyee he will happy and forget he’s father

Wow we are like two peas in the pod! I also have a 16 year old son whose dad died 3 years ago. Grief has left its mark on me – I have gained 50 lbs… My son does well, I essentially reinforced in him that what happened to his dad was not his fault, not in his control and he has a right to be sad and pissed. I don’t make my kids go to his grave because its painful it only reinforces pain and absence. I encourage memories and funny stories and good times, and how his dad is at peace and is watching over us. I encourage the fact that he is very much alive in our hearts. I know this probably sounds trite and redundant, but maybe you should look to a Dr to help him cope and overcome his depression. My heart goes out to you, because I know how hard this has been and continues to be – and single parenting sucks – its something I never counted on…..but I do the best I can and thats all anyone ever can do. God bless you…

No. This is known as maladaptive grief and prof. help should be warranted for this adolescent.

Okay, why would you force him to visit the grave if he doesn’t want to? You need to quit that right now. I lost my dad at 16 and had no counseling until I was in my early twenties and it hurt my grades and my whole life. Of course he is mad, it’s a stage of grief. Without a healthy outlet, like counseling, where he can talk about it in private without you, he’s headed down a slippery slope that will affect his future.

Parents often think they can help their child through anything. And sometimes they can but sometimes they make it worse, like with making him go to the grave. Face it there are things he will NEVER share with you. He is a teen and needs to be in grief counseling or a bereavement support group with peers. If you have to drive 200 miles you take him. He may not want to go, but unless you want him turning to other outlets, like drugs, etc to ease the pain, take him. After he talks to kids his age going through it a few times, he will most likely return without a fuss.

PS- dont hide your grief ever. That only will cause him to feel more guilty for showing his.

yes thats normal for your son to feel that way.Don’t be afraid of silence if your teen is not ready or able to talk. Provide comfort and care by just being there. Rather than tell them how they should or should not feel, confirm their feelings and offer understanding for the difficult emotions involved with grief.

Help teens recognize the many emotions that can be a part of grief, but that all of us react to grief in different ways. Here are some common emotions that may accompany grief:

Numbness, shock, and disbelief—especially when death is sudden or unexpected. These feelings provide a protective response that shields us from dealing with overwhelming emotions until we can face them. Our words are often “I don’t believe it,” or “it can’t be true.” The reactions of others may be to get us to face the truth, when we just need time to absorb the awfulness of what has happened. It is much better to say to a teen in this stage, “I know, it’s hard for me to believe it, too.”

Anger, frustration, and rage—it is common to feel angry with God, the doctor, the person who died, or ourselves. We may blame God for allowing the person to die. We may blame the doctor for not helping the person to get well. We may blame the person for smoking or driving too fast. We almost always blame ourselves for all the “if only” and “what ifs” we can think of. Teens may say things like, “God is not real” or “Life is not fair.”

Avoid reacting with “Don’t say that” or “You don’t mean that.” Instead, affirm their feelings with, “You are very angry. I get angry too when life doesn’t seem fair or things happen that don’t make sense to me.”

Depression, emptiness, and loneliness—sometimes teens can feel so sad and empty they say, “I don’t want to live anymore.” Rather than reacting with, “Don’t say that” or “You don’t mean that,” focus on listening. You might say, “Death is so hard to accept that sometimes we feel like we don’t want to go on” or “You miss her so much now but a time will come when you will feel some happiness again.”

If your teen is overwhelmed with grief and still having difficulty with daily functioning after six months, it is time to seek professional help. Help him understand that just as you look for a skilled person to learn a new sport—like basketball or volleyball—it is helpful to let those who have skills in handling emotions guide us when we have to deal with a difficult loss.