traditional expenses in his words are rehearsal dinner, all alcohol at reception, and honeymoon. Now remember they have been married 1 year already!
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Written by kristennikco about 1 year ago.
Who cares how long they have been married?!!? Everyone deserves to have that special day and sometimes circumstances make it where you just can’t do things in the traditional order or way.
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Written by Shelly C about 1 year ago.
tell him tough luck! You are not obligated to pay. Sounds like he’s looking for handouts to me. If dad wants to help say here son here is $xx.xx and that’s my portion of the help I can afford.
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Written by mynxr about 1 year ago.
How do you have a wedding after you have been married for a year? They can have a reception but I’m not sure there is any official that will officiate at a sham wedding which is what it would be. That said, if I were his father, I would tell him he’ll contribute ex to the party but that’s it and they can use it however they like.
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Written by cindy d about 1 year ago.
Ouch! It’s a little late for that! What does your husband say? It’s a little like putting the cart before the horse!
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Written by basketcase88 about 1 year ago.
Your step son has already HAD his wedding–this is called a vow renewal. Sorry, you don’t get 2 weddings to the same person within a year.
But I would also leave this between your husband and step son. Let your hubby know your feelings about it in private, and let him and his son hash it out. I think it’s very interesting that you stated his son “expects” his dad to pay the traditional expenses–he didn’t ASK??? That right there would get an automatic “NO” from me. You don’t expect me to pay for anything when you’re a grown adult, capable of paying for it yourself.
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Written by oy vey about 1 year ago.
I would be ticked too. And as far as tradition goes-the groom pays for the honeymoon.
I feel that if they had to get married a year ago, then that was their choice. They had a wedding. They’re done. Did you give them a wedding gift last year? They chose to get married a year ago. I don’t buy the “everyone deserves their big day” crap. They made their choice. If they want to have a large celebration now then they can figure out how to pay for it.
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Written by The AntiChrist about 1 year ago.
hehehe…I had a sister in law that tried that crap, to fool her momma. She’d married some yahoo that no one knew anything about, had several different names…they had her poor old father spring for a big fake wedding just so he and momma could get all gushy and stuff. The rest of us didn’t mind, because it was just a free feed, although we did laugh at them about if. We didn’t find out his real name until he died from hep C.
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Written by aly about 1 year ago.
Your husband is not obligated to pay for any of it, and his son should not expect it. All of the weddings I have gone to the couple have paid for their own wedding except for certain things where their parents OFFERED to pay for as a wedding GIFT. I wouldn’t say that I would cover all the expenses of the rehearsal dinner, alchohol, etc but instead say, “XX amount is how much I will give to you for some of the expenses, spend it however you may but that’s all I can give.” Actually since they have already been married before I’m sure you have already given them a wedding present so I wouldn’t. I agree with the others on this, they had their opportunity to have a big wedding and they chose against it. In this case i dont think another wedding appropriate, but a reception could be, but still you’re husband is not obligated to pay for it and he most definitely should not pay for the honeymoon! That is just selfish on their behalf to even ask that!
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Written by I Love My Crazy Life! about 1 year ago.
Ok first of all the grooms family is expected to pay for. . . the engagement party (if there is one), the rehearsal dinner, and their clothes. The groom himself pays for the bride’s rings, the marriage license, Officiant’s fee, His formalwear, Personal flowers: the bride’s bouquet, boutonnieres for wedding party, corsages for mothers and grandmothers, gifts for the groomsmen, wedding gift for the bride, gifts for parents, and the honeymoon.
I would say if they chose to forgo the wedding when they actually got married they are kind of stuck with the costs. . . especially the alcohol and the honeymoon! I mean, really that is ridiculous! That said, it would be an awfully nice wedding gift for you and his dad to help out with the expense of a wedding, but only if it would cause NO financial harship for the two of you.
When I got married my folks footed the whole bill. . . aside from the rehearsal dinner. Although I’m sure they would have appreciated some help! :0)
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Written by Bride 2 Be about 1 year ago.
No one should expect their parents to pay for their weddings. However, I don’t think it’s a problem for children to ASK their parents. If your husband wants to give him the money then so be it. If you fight your husband on this one you’ll come off looking like the evil stepmonsters. (BTW, I can’t believe how many stepmothers come on this site, complaining about paying for their stepkid’s weddings. Many parents are happy to help out, but stepmothers never seem to be.)
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Written by tineyfiney about 1 year ago.
What a mooch! He should have a vow renewal, which will cost much less. Your husband could offer to pay 1/3 of the total cost, with the 1/3 coming from the bride’s parents and 1/3 from the couple themselves. I think they should pay for their own “honeymoon” which is really just a vacation at this point. If you both decide not to give them any money I think that’s totally acceptable too. Just talk to your hubby and try to compromise.
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Written by kill_yr_television about 1 year ago.
I have certainly seen “the wedding” evolve in my lifetime.
First, young couples got engaged and tried to persuade the parents to host the wedding (pay for the honeymoon) on their own terms instead in the way the parents wished.
Then, couples of various ages got engaged and tried to browbeat parents into financing a wedding in which the bride and groom were making all the decisions.
Now, already married couples are having “a wedding” whenever they feel like it and demanding that parents treat them to an elaborate party followed by an all-expenses-paid vacation.
No wonder so people are choosing to remain childless.
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Written by A Nonny Mouse about 1 year ago.
How many weddings does one couple get?????
As many as they want…as long as they understand after the first wedding the parents don’t foot the bill……..if the couple wants a second wedding , or a do-over wedding, the cost is all theirs……and the groom is the one whose traditionally is supposed to pay for the honeymoon…any honeymoon……not his father!
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Written by iloveweddings about 1 year ago.
Tell the “groom” to get with it.
He is married. He doesn’t get a “do-over.”
Even if he was not married, the expenses for the wedding, reception and the honeymoon rests solely on the bride and groom. If others (family) wish to contribute, they can. But by no means are the expected to.
Why the do-over? What is going on with that?
No, I hope your husband is putting his foot down and not paying a thing. The son sounds selfish and greedy. It will be interesting to see how many come to the “do-over.”
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Written by rico about 1 year ago.
He had 1 year to gather the cash and if you are odl enough to marry you are old enough to pay for it.
He clearly has taken all the traditionals stops as this 3 are a groom problem traditionally and the whole rest the woman’s.
Personally i think he should pay for what he can afford and thats that.
Forcing out money from parents for a wedding is plain wrong! -
Written by Elizabeth about 1 year ago.
Traditionally the groom pays for the honeymoon himself, so he’s out of luck on that one.
If you are willing, give him a check for a flat amount and then he and his bri… er, wife… can figure out how to spend it. You are under ZERO obligation to give them anything. Same goes for her parents. There is no need for you to spend the same amount as they do, or anything at all, even if they weren’t already married.
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Written by Mrs.Bride about 1 year ago.
He should pay for his own wedding even if he wasn’t married a year
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Written by Lydia about 1 year ago.
Well, daddy has to say no. Son is mature and already married, and if they are planning a party, the couple pays for it themselves.
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