My husband left 3 years ago My son asks to buy him a Daddy. How do I cope with this pain?? :(?

08/12/2010 admin 9 comments

ok so i was married for 6 years had a little boy during marriage we were fine everything was peachy king,, then we separated for like almost 2 months but he would still come around for our son pick him up do all the daddy & son things, well out of the blue he started being different he changed his# moved stop calling completely M.I.A for now 3 yrs… I found out he’s got a gf whom he smokes METH with… =( and I’m sad but I guess its life He doesn’t call for his son, doesn’t come around at all, My son asks about him constantly and I just say he’s been working in the Army i don’t know what to tell him, Finally the other day he said “Mommy Daddy isn’t coming back, He forgot about me, so can u just please go buy me a Daddy” U can only imagine how I felt, What should I do? He doesn’t want to come around when I got his new # recently his new gf said to stop calling and to find my son a father then next day changed #, I’m so hurt Its been 3 yrs, What’s next?? please help me explain to my son, Thank you SOO much!! could he have really stopped loving my son? I just don’t get it.. : (

DRUG REHABILITATION asks, cope, daddy, husband, left, pain, this, years

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Written by casslasure about 1 year ago.

you can go pick him up a daddy for about $500.00 at k mart
Written by lovelymissromo about 1 year ago.

forget about the dad… your his mom and dad now and yes its gonna be hard but trust me you’ll get through it. whenever he asks for a dad just tell him “daddys not here anymore but you have me. and you’ll always have me” reassure your love to him all the time and do all the things moms and sons do together and all the things dads and sons do together. spending time with your son will help the time go by and help heal the wounds that you have…..and in the end youre gonna have the most awesomest son ever and he’ll have you and only you to thank for it.
Written by beautiful_mayhem about 1 year ago.

Get a divorce and get full custody with child support. Your husband has proven the last 3 years he wants nothing to do with the with the two of you so a lawyer would have a field day with this! Go after him for a divorce. Make it to where he gets NO visitation, and maybe even go after his rights.

Be honest with your son, depending on how old he is. Tell him he did NOTHING wrong, sometimes people don’t want kids and even though they don’t, they have them anyway. Just love him and tell him it is fine.

Meth is a bad drug and your son is better off not being around that. You could lose your boy if your ex has him while doing meth and cops bust him.

Call a lawyer and I would have called them yesterday! GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!
Written by soul m about 1 year ago.

hi YES its so sad when this happens , when someone once loved stops being nice, what u can need to do its never make excuses for hes dad just be open saying you only really have one real daddy its choice if he stops coming to see you both , work on your love your son be strong for him also be open so he know as he grows that your a good mum who put your son hes needs first say in time you mite meet Other daddy’s but takes being friends first and time g things to him Willl help you both and talking things trough Alwayss helps in time.
Written by thatartistwin about 1 year ago.

No. He did not stop loving your son. Meth is the worst drug ever. Meth users are obsessed with it and it is their number one love. If his new girlfriend thinks that he loves even her more than meth she is sadly mistaken. I am sure he cries about his son all the time when coming down from his highs and then goes to buy more to escape the thoughts. Unfortunately it is a drug hard to come off of. He will either HAVE TO get into treatment because of the problems that arise from it and the court mandating it, or he will die from it.

Here is the advice I have for you:

Though he is drug addicted, he is not allowed to leave your son behind and his responsibilites. He is liable for child support. It would be in your best interest to invite the police to your house to give them a heads up on his escapades and have them raid his place. They can arrest him which would do him and yourself a favor.

I also suggest you attend an Alanon or NA meeting for families of drug users and learn methods of coping.

In addition, I suggest you live your life and find a nice man who will be a positive influence in you and your sons life .

I don’t know the age of your son but you may want to contact “big brothers of America” if that is where you live so he can enjoy the company of a male influence

good luck
Written by Riverrat715 about 1 year ago.

Are you divorced? Does he pay child support? You need to do something if you are still married to this guy. He is a drug addict. If he is doing meth he really doesn’t care about you or his child. I have had a lot of experience with people on meth. My daughter was addicted. It is a monster drug. People who are on it really don’t care about any thing or anyone. They are very paranoid. I suggest that you not try to contact him. You do not know how he might react and you don’t want him around your son. Don’t continue to lie to your son about his dad. Tell him that he is sick because that is the truth. I wish you luck. Just give that little boy all the love you can. I hope for his sake that at some point his daddy recovers and again comes to see him.
Written by Alice about 1 year ago.

you need to be more honest with your son. just tell him something like this. you already have a daddy so i cant buy you another one. Your dad is living somewhere else and chosen another life. Sometimes in life even tho we love someone.. we have to let them go to do other things they wish to enjoy in life. Try and meet someone else who is a good male role model for your boy. it must be heartbreaking.. i know but honesty is the best way in the long run.
Written by joan.cardono@sbcglobal.net about 1 year ago.

why don’t you try big brothers, they really help a lot of boys to connect with a male role model.
Written by kttphoenix about 1 year ago.

The first thing you need to is start calling him your EX, not husband, If you haven’t, file for divorce now. That’s for you, bc you can;t take care of your son if you don;t take care of yourself also.

Until you are ready to get back into dating, surround you son with strong men in your family and friends that he can model himself after. Let the sperm donor destroy himself doing meth with the ho he found. You build your life up and take care of your boy.

How Do I Get My Son Off Drugs?

My husband left 3 years ago My son asks to buy him a Daddy. How do I cope with this pain?? :(?

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