Moms and Dads! How do I get my 16 year old son to realize the importance of school?

03/02/2011 admin 19 comments

I have a son in 10th grade who is NEVER motivated. He always gets 1 or 2 F’s. We’re trying to stress the importance of getting his diploma. Before we were stressing the importance of college and the good grades, but now we’re stressing the importance of a diploma. He’s a GREAT son and we have NEVER have problems with him, however he’s always had a lack of enthusiasm. He’s just like his dad with a real laid back type of personality. He has a caring heart and everything. He’s never gotten into drugs or alcohol. He’s an all-in-all great 16 year old. Nothing really bothers him or phases him and that kinds of worries me. Any good suggestions or books I can read how to help him get excited about something? Thanks.

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Written by Henry_Tee about 1 year ago.

try to be more involved in his education meaning help him with his school work everyday
Written by Jamie about 1 year ago.

Maybe you could try motivating him with rewards, like money,a car, ect.
Written by xoCarolinaxo about 1 year ago.

Well, I’m not a mom or dad, but I am a student in high school. What I realize has motivated me to get A’s in school are the people I hang out with. I always make sure to keep a few friends that are really dedicated to school so I can always go to them for help and they keep me on track.
Written by khorat k about 1 year ago.

Get him into some kind of military like activity.
Written by sandy p about 1 year ago.

FIRST TAKE HIM TO SKID ROW TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU DONT CARE MY SON IS 13 AND ALMOST SOUNDS LIKE YOUR TELLING MY STORY I LET HIM KNOW ILL GO TO SCHOOL IF HE THINKS HES GONNA SCREW UP HE DOESENT WANT THAT THIS WORKS MIRACLES
Written by KA about 1 year ago.

Hate to say this but I think you started too late. The motivation should have started at age 1. He will understand when eveyone else goes to college nd he is home flipping burgrs.
Written by Craig B about 1 year ago.

Try to be involved in what his homework is

OR tell him you will send him to a Military School Its a CLASSIC
Written by Izetriyen about 1 year ago.

actually, starting to get involved in his school work now wouldnt hurt. if youre involved and motivated …so would he be if that is the type of personality he is. know your child enough to know that he needs your input and involvement.
Written by stoney about 1 year ago.

try offering things to him when he gets good grades.

money, prizes, and games. watever hes into for his good grades. say stuff like i will do this for you if you get all A’s. also offer to help him with his homework. im not saying help cheat. and ask teachers and friends to help.
Written by Bark about 1 year ago.

im not a parent, but your son sounds a lot like i was. i was a horrible high school student. absolutely horrible. but the minute i entered college (i started out at community college), for some reason my whole attitude changed. i did decently in community college. and then when i went on to the 4 year college……i did very, very well. graduated with honors. unfortunately there is probably not much you can do to get your son to start getting interested in school. it is going to have to come at his own time. and hopefully he is like i was and he does finally start to gain an interest in school if and when he goes to college. he is just going to have to find out on his own what his interests are for having a future career. and if its not college, then it had better be a good trade. the only thing you really can do at this time is to just give him suggestions every now and then. ask him what he might want to do for a living. give him suggestions of careers. if he shows any interest in something, then stress to him what he has to do to get there.
Written by Birdie about 1 year ago.

nnnnnnnnn…..mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….ooooooo.. egh egh well you could motivate him with something he really wants “You get good grades and we’ll getchyoo it.” or you could show him the importance of good grades tell him it’s a cycle and he’s just going to have to get good grades if he wants a good job he goes to college and if he wants to go to college he’s got to get good grades. it’s time he steps it up. my parents usually make me feel guilty. it’s sad.
Written by Kevmagellan about 1 year ago.

Telling him again and again and again will only piss him off more. It did to me 5 years ago. For this problem, my dad 5 years ago gave me a lot money everytime I got A’s. Since I was a greedy, spoiled, rich kid, I complied. Now, Im working on my Mechanical/Civil Engineer Degree and know how important it is for a degree. I’ve also took the liberty to invest in some stock and help pay for the house.
Written by riffle about 1 year ago.

I would have him work during the summer at McD’s, Burger King or the like….give him a choice of three of the worse minimum wage paying jobs possible. Let him get the picture of the road his laid back attitude toward school will start him down. I would also reward more motivated choices with priviledges, while offering no extras for lack there of. At 10th grade, he needs to be shown that it is a competitive world out there, and he needs to participate in his life. At the same time you should be very involved in getting him in a good routine for school & in helping him explore what goals he might start working toward. Without goals, it is impossible to stimulate motivation. Good Luck!
Written by DrPhilamina about 1 year ago.

I would start focusing on what he wants to do career/work-wise after high school, and then point out matter of factly what he needs to do to achieve that. You need to find a way to get him to look ahead like 5 years from now. If he says he wants to be a paramedic or a video game designer, or work in construction; take him to meet people who work in that field, so that they can tell him what education they needed to get their job, or why that education is important in their field. Maybe your son doesn’t see the connection between knowing math and being a paramedic. Get him excited about it.

Don’t give up, you have to keep pushing him. Keep on him everynight about how his homework is coming.
Written by Tori W about 1 year ago.

here are the things you need to show adnd describe to him
1. the kind of pay he will get if he doesnt go to school
2. the kinda place he will end up living in
3. the types of jobs that he will get like drive thru at mcdonalds and that the only thing at work is the possible promotion from drive thru to the deep ffryer aint that an honor by the way if you really want him to straighten out paint the worst pivture ever on what his life will end up like and leave out no greusem details
Written by Stacey R about 1 year ago.

Well i have a four year old daughter so I don’t know if this will help or not, try to persuade him. Don’t bribe but tell him that if he gets all A’s or B’s on a report card, he’ll get something special. If that doesn’t work you should take him to a tutor.
Written by ronkpaws about 1 year ago.

See if you can get him to volunteer some of his time, serving food to the homeless in your town. Then tell him that the road he is headed down, he will be one of the people in that food line.
And he also sounds like a perfect candidate for military school, were they will motivate him and instill real life values in him.
When he graduates from a military high school, you will see a young man with confidence in himself, and to sense of direction.
Written by Jadead about 1 year ago.

i am 15/16 and i think the reason why i try hard at school, is because my parents have scared me into not being some burger flipper. Everytime we go to maccas, my mum points out how degrading it would be to work there or other things.

Make up stories about a ‘friend of a friend’ and tell him how thie ‘friend of a friend’ didn’t study for school and failed it, ended up living in a really shitty situation and is now in jail.

Yep, scare tactic is the best.

and also the reward system works well, i’m currently working hard to get a car.
Written by like-it about 1 year ago.

When I was 16 there was a lot of pressure from my parents to be not just good but excellent at school. Nowadays pressuring your 16 year old to the point where he just doesn’t want to do bugger all is just plain wrong, because that’s basically what happened to me. In the end, I gave up trying, luckily I finished my college degree and graduated. Not up to my parents’ standard, but heck… I wouldn’t want any parents to do the same to their teens.
Giving rewards is always good, I know I have a teen daughter who is average at school, but I have been “bribing” her to improve her school marks. I also make sure she knows I’m there when she needs help with home work etc.
Never nag. It will only drive him crazy. Point out that nowadays you can’t get a decent job without qualifications etc.
Sounds like all he needs to do is encouragement, not “stressing” or pressuring.

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