Yes

Would he be willing to sign over his parental rights before the baby is born

from what you said, you should get full custody and yes you should be able to make him get treatment and also he should be made to go for counceling. good luck in going for custody

You can easily get full custody..and have SUPERVISED visitations at your request.

be ready to prove he is an alcoholic and he has done the things you state. and if he is bi-polar..make him get checked by mental health people

yes hun you can do that you have to show that your a better parent but it shouldn’t be hard. to me it sounds like your on the right road but don’t let the love you have for him interfere with the positive decisions that you are trying to make.

yes there is a big chance u can get full custody
http://www.searchpilot.info/index.php?kx=Win+Custody+From+Alcoholic+Father
http://parents.berkeley.edu/advice/family/custody.html
Child custody can be the most controversial issues during a divorce. Child custody battles often send children into the heat of argument, and child custody is never fair to one parent or the other. Laws are ever changing and giving child custody to the father or the mother is an ongoing battle that must be decided in certain cases. Learning more about the rules, statutes, and regulations dealing with child custody, you will be able to find loopholes and examples of how solution can be found to just about any particular situation involving child custody.

Through out history the courts have leaned towards mothers getting child custody, full physical custody but there are many laws that have changed this where more fathers are able and getting custody of their children. There are divorced fathers who have full time custody of their children with the mother having visitation rights on the weekends, a complete reversal of norm just ten to fifteen years ago! Using the appeals process, either parent can obtain custody. With support being discussed, the topic of being an unfit parent is also addressed, leaving either parent to obtain custody. Stability in the home life is what is most often looked at when the court has to decide which parent the child is going to live with.

Still in other cases through the country, there are many courts and judges, who are favoring shared custody, but this is still not in all cases. Shared custody is where the mother will have the child (ren) for three or four days and then the father will have the child (ren) for the other three or four days. This goes on each week, where the children are going back and forth spending equal time with both parent. Again, this is one of the biggest arguments when two parents are getting a divorce.

One method that is used when a father is seeking custody is to prove the mother is unfit. If the mother is proven to be unfit, she won’t get child custody but she still might get visitation rights and overnight visits. A mother can be determined unfit through various methods. Consulting your state regulations and laws you will find many examples such as drug use, being an alcoholic, not being able to provide a home or clothing, mental disturbances, and so on. Of course this can work both ways, if one parent wants to get custody they only have to prove the other unfit and the court will grant the other parent full physical custody.

Either the mother or the father could be proved unfit in a family court case. However, how do you define “unfit” in a child custody suit? The interest of the children is what matters in child custody. Couples should think long and hard about if they really want child custody or if they are just being ‘mean’ to their spouse. If you really have no interest in taking responsibility for the child or children, you need to rethink your custody suit. If you prove the other parent is unfit and you in turn do not care for the child, you also will lose custody. The child could easily be placed in foster care when two parents are unfit.

Child custody leads to child support and financial issues which are also long and heated battles through out the children’s lifetime. Child custody can result in a split between parents’ responsibilities. Children are often shared in a child custody case. Then there is joint custody, which is another type of child custody. Split custody means each parent has full custody for a period of time and joint custody means they both have child custody jointly.

Child custody laws frequently change, and the courts are more in favor of searching for the best situation and the environment for the children when going through a divorce. Often, the parent who is on the losing end of the child custody case feels like a victim of the divorce and of the failed marriage. Parents that are on the ‘losing’ end of the agreement often feel like they have to try to turn the children against the other parent.

Turning the children against another parent is done through words, actions and continued badgering of the child. When one parent is always saying bad things about one parent to the child, all that this really does in the end is hurt the child. The child should not be put in the middle of your arguments; it is bad enough that they have to listen to you fighting before the divorce. After custody has been settled, everyone needs to at least ‘get along’ for the benefit of the child, emotional scars are tough for a child of any age. When both parents try for the best of the best of the child, the child will be more secure and confident about their situation – they will feel as if they are ‘allowed’ to love both of their parents equally!

If you are being sued for custody, you need to do your research and some hard thinking about your situation. Can your ex provide a better situation for your child or children? Do you feel that you are the better-suited parent for full time legal and physical custody? Long after the settlement for divorce has been made, the children are going to suffer if you don’t make the right decisions. If you truly love your children and you can’t care for them financially or emotionally, then the children may be better off with your ex. If you love your children, plus you have the financial stability and the power emotionally to handle raising the children alone – then fight for them!

Don’t go into court without learning all you can about child custody laws, what you can change later if things don’t go right for the kids. What if things get better for you, can you get the children back? If your ex remarries the spouse from hell, what exactly can you do about it? What if the kids want to change who that they live with, when can they make their own decisions? You need to learn the many laws that affect your state, your surroundings and when and if you can change custody arrangements and child support payments. The appeal process can be used any time your situation changes or when the children have a different need.

Being a single parent is tough, so be sure you study the child custody laws carefully and decide how your life will resume from that point forward. You will have responsibilities every day. You have to look out for the best of the children. You don’t have to be a lawyer, but you need to understand what your lawyer is going to need to do the very best job for you and yours in a child custody fight.

Choosing a lawyer can be difficult no matter what your situation is. Be sure to look for a lawyer that has links in your hometown. It is a known fact that lawyers with links to the court house are going to be able to get a better deal with the judge, while this is not always the case it is a good start. Looking for a lawyer that is in your hometown will ensure that you are going to be using a lawyer that is going to be more in line with the prices of your town. Sometimes going with an out of town lawyer means that you could be paying more than you have to.

Choosing a lawyer is just like choosing a doctor. You have to be able to trust your lawyer and know that they are going to ‘fight’ for what you want and not just get the court case in and out of the way. Your lawyer should offer you advice and should answer all your questions about your case. If you are asking questions without getting answers, then maybe you should be seeking out a different lawyer.

There are many heated discussions and battles that will take place during divorce about money. When you are getting a divorce and there are children involved, child custody and child support become very important topics. Child support and child custody are issues that are going to walk hand in hand.

One last thing that you might want to think about when deciding if you want to fight for sole custody or if you are going to have joint or shared custody is that you could still be paying the same amount of child support even if you have the child three or four days of each week. Consider having your lawyer use this fact in your child support case when you have gotten everything you wanted when fighting your child custody case!

Use the online resources and tools here at Divorce Dirty Tricks to learn more about how to handle yourself during the custody hearings, the child support hearings and more tricks that you can use after the initial agreements have been made.
http://www.divorcedirtytricks.com/child_custody.htm
http://www.expertlaw.com/forums/showthread.php?t=3935
Joint Custody vs. Sole Custody
& Residential Parent Status – Who gets the Kids?
Joint Custody vs. Sole Custody

Often, divorcing couples with children are most concerned over matters relating to custody and visitation. At ISABEL M. MILLARD we work closely with many allied professionals (child psychologists and evaluators) to ensure that our custody and visitation agreements serve the best interests of the children as well as the parents.

Illinois recognizes two basic forms of child custody: joint custody and sole custody. Joint custody has gained both notoriety and popularity over the past several years. At its best, joint custody allows for the maximum involvement of both parents in the lives of their children – signaling to the children that, despite their parents’ differences, their needs are what is most important. At its worst, joint custody can serve as a source of ongoing disagreement and litigation between the parties – signaling to the children that they are merely pawns in their parents never-ending battles.

Successful joint custody is not easy. It takes hard work, dedication and a great deal of compromise. Children grow and change and their needs fluctuate year to year. As such, the Parenting Agreement that made perfect sense at the time of the divorce must be reviewed and updated regularly. If parents are not willing to recognize this simple fact and work together for the best interests of their children, joint custody will not be successful.

Joint custody requires parents to consult and cooperate on all significant matters concerning the children – education, health care, religious training, etc. If the parties did not co-parent the children during the marriage, there is little reason to believe that joint parenting will occur after the divorce.

A common misperception among parents is the notion that joint custody means equal parenting time. Not so. Parenting time for the non-custodial parent is the same in both sole and joint custody situations. Another common misperception is that an award of joint custody will prevent the custodial parent from moving out of state with the children. A custodial parent cannot unilaterally move out of state absent agreement of the other parent or an order of Court, regardless of whether he or she holds joint or sole custody of the child.

Residential Status – Who Gets the Kids?

The Court can award joint custody only when such an arrangement serves the best interest of the child. When the parties are in agreement about joint custody, they will enter into a Joint Parenting Agreement. One parent will be designated as the “residential” parent with whom the child resides. Child support is paid to the residential parent, in the same amount as paid to a parent having sole custody. Residential status does not confer additional rights to that parent. It simply indicates with whom the child resides after the divorce.

The Judge is mandated by law to consider the following items when deciding which custodial arrangement serves the best interest of the child:

the wishes of the child’s parent or parents as to his custody;
the wishes of the child as to his custodian;
the interaction and interrelationship of the child with his parent or parents, his siblings and any other person who may significantly affect the child’s best interest;
the child’s adjustment to his home, school and community;
the mental and physical health of all individuals involved;
the physical violence or threat of physical violence by the child’s potential custodian, whether directed against the child or directed against another person;
the occurrence of ongoing abuse as defined in Section 103 of the Illinois Domestic Violence Act of 1986, whether directed against the child or directed against another person; and
the willingness and ability of each parent to facilitate and encourage a close and continuing relationship between the other parent and the child”.
(750 ILCS 5/602).

If the parents cannot reach an agreement on custody, the court can require the parties to attend mediation. The mediation process is used to assess what is in the best interests of the children as far as custody and visitation arrangements are concerned. A mediator is a neutral third party who helps the parties reach their own agreement. Please see our page on mediation for further information.

If the parties cannot agree on custody (and mediation is unsuccessful), the court will order a custody evaluation. First, the Court will appoint a custody evaluator. A custody evaluator is a psychiatrist or psychologist with special training and expertise in custody issues. The evaluator will meet with each of the parents separately, conduct psychological testing of each parent (and possibly the children), observe each parent interacting with the children, interview the children and others familiar with the family (i.e. teachers, therapists, doctors, family members). Once the interview portion is concluded, the custody evaluator will write a detailed report to the Court, making specific recommendations about who should receive custody and what visitation arrangements are in the children’s best interests. The custody evaluator is the Court’s witness, thus, the Judge will give great weight to the evaluator’s recommendations in making the ruling. The cost of the custody evaluation is usually borne by the parties, in proportion to their respective incomes. If either mother or father does not agree to the custody evaluator’s recommendations, a second custody evaluation, with a new evaluator, may possibly occur. The cost of the second evaluation is always borne by the party requesting same.
http://www.divorce-law-illinois.com/custody.html
http://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/index.php/Child_custody
http://www.custody911.com/frameset_child_custody_911.htm

First of all let me say that you need to do whats best for your child. You child does not need to be around someone who is abuse and has an alcohol problem. I think that you should try to get sole custody of your child because if the father was so concerned about his son he would have gotten help for his problem a long time ago. As far as filing for child support you should have done that as soon as you had your child. Your child needs to be financially taking care of as well as mentally and emotionally.

~If this guy was so serious about suicide then he would have already done so. He is threating you because he can and its obviously working.

what’s more important, the well-being of you and your children or the well-being of an abusive, neglectful partner? Unfortunately, sometimes you have to chose between the two. Why do you want to allow him to have visitations if he’s leading a lifestyle that is detrimental to himself and your children? He left your child alone to go drinking for crying out loud.
Sometimes you have to count your losses and cut someone loose. I realize you’re going to do it your way, but I don’t understand why you would want to keep this guy in your life. He’s harmful to you and your kids. Get full custody and make him clean up his act before he can visit the kids. Otherwise I see this as little more than a recipe for disaster.