His mom is currently working as a prostitute, and Im serious. How do you explain to him that what his parents are doing affects him in a negative way? Also what do you say when you run into either of them. His father currently is incarcerated and I ran into his so called mother~the egg donor~ over the weekend. She pretended to pretend that I was someone else. She had the nerve to say why dont we (meaning my husband and I) allow her to come over to see him. I told her that we feel it is best that right now she stays away because she is all messed up. I told her that he was alright and well taken care of. He has been in counseling for many years, sometimes it seems to be working and at times it doesnt seem to be working. Also we have tried several times to allow her to come and see him, to be fooled yet once again by her claiming she was straight, and find out that she lied. What do we do? I can not afford an attorney to file for permenant custody, we just ahve temp custody.
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Written by sayruh02 about 2 years ago.
explain to him it’s not his fault who he was born too. see if there is some kind of foundation in your area that could help with adopting him.
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Written by smokes_girl about 2 years ago.
well this is an age sensitive thing..
but basically you break it down in whatever age he is that mommy and daddy are not in a position to provide for him. they are having some problems and can not give him the things he needs right now.
honestly, i would avoid them if at all possible bu during run in’s i would treat it as a run in with a stranger. -
Written by Emily D about 2 years ago.
How old is this nephew that you have custody of?
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Written by alleykhad607 about 2 years ago.
talk to children’s services and ask them ,what you should do.
perm. custody is the next step.you can also go to juvenile court and apply for custody. with out a lawyer.. -
Written by drezgurly about 2 years ago.
LEGAL AID will help if u cant afford a lawyer and the legalities
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Written by Bob S about 2 years ago.
I have a very close friend going through a freakishly similar situation. The best thing that she’s done is to take the high road and not speak ill of the parents. No matter what a parent has done, their kids still love them. If someone bad-mouths mommy and daddy, kids tend to interalize that they too are scum.
It’s such a tough situation because you want to rant and scream about what messed-up idiots they are, but you don’t want to hurt the little guy anymore than he’s already been hurt.
Kids are smart. They know FAR more than we give them credit for. Depending on the kid’s age, I’d be surprised if he wasn’t already aware what shmucks his parents are. The best thing you can do is be supportive, unjudgemental, and loving.
My ex’s sister is a drug abuser, thief, and in & out of jail on a regular basis. My kids are old enough to know that “Auntie Rachel” is a mess. When they ask me why she does what she’s doing, I explain about addictions and that they sometimes cause people to do things that they shouldn’t becuase they’re not thinking clearly. That drug abuse can cause them to loose sight of what is really important.
If no one else has said it, thank you for caring for the little guy. The world needs more people like you who are willing and able to help out, when necessary.
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Written by olelady55 about 2 years ago.
First off, God bless you for taking responsibility for this child. If there is any justice in this world, you will have a special place in Heaven. This is just my opinion. Frankly, you should consult a child psychologist, but I absolutely believe you should not belittle a child’s parents to them. You could explain that the mother or father was having health problems at this time and was not able to properley care for the child. Tell the child that, while mommy and daddy love him or her very much, they feel that the child would be better off living with you for the time being. NEVER let this child feel that his/her parent(s) don’t want him/her. NOTHING WILL BE SOLVED BY SAYING BAD THINGS ABOUT THE PARENT!!!! It is a child’s nature to believe the best about his/her parents. If you run them down, you not only hurt the child, you basically cut your own throat. I beg you to put the child’s well-being first. Take the role of “helper”. Know in your heart what a wonderful thing you are doing. I will pray for you.
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Written by jgmafb about 2 years ago.
well instead of going on the internet and and painting such a high and mighty picture of myself,and talking total trash on my own”FLESH and BLOOD”to a world of strangers,,,,
I would be more concerned about “helping” them and talk is not gonna do it.
With your attitude I don’t agree that you would be the right one to have permanent custody of the kid,,and if you can’t afford a lawyer like you say,,then I don’t see how you can afford the kid.
Trust me just your attitude,,,if I knew where and who you was,I would use my connections in the Federal system to have the kid taken into “protective custody” away from it’s mother and you.Cause you need help too!What do you have hiding in your closet’s???? -
Written by sleepy about 2 years ago.
try your best to keep them from they child because that has a big affect on the child’s mentallity, the child won’t understand but what you see is how they will react.
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Written by C about 2 years ago.
Two of my friends who are twins came from a family of drug addicts, they were put in foster care as 3yr olds, they switched families when they were 5 and stayed with them until recently when they were both kicked out for misbehaving… But as 3yr olds, they knew more about drugs than most adults do… They knew why they got taken away from mommy and by the time they were gone their dad had been shot dead by police already… They grew up with the image that police are bad people, when the house got raided their mom put cocaine down their diapers… Kids know more than you think, and a kid from a family of drug addicts definately knows whats going on… He might not say anything… But he knows… If he wants to know why he got taken away from mommy and daddy, tell him that they are sick, and needed help taking care of him, tell him they will be okay… Relate it to something he’ll understand… like the stomach flu… “you remember when you had the stomach flu and kept throwing up? you needed help to get better right? it’s kinda like that with mommy and daddy, they need help to get better before they can take care of you properly, but once they get help, you can go home if you want”
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Written by blah at you about 2 years ago.
just tell him his mom and dad have a sickness that maybe in time they will get better
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